Since the Department of Homeland Security has a new Disinformation Squad tasked with “countering false narratives,” meaning non-DHS-approved ones, I decided to save them some work by flagging my own video as follows:
The Department of Homeland Security Disinformation Squad warns that this video may elicit unapproved thoughts, illicit impulses, and inappropriate laughter. The final segment on the Hitler Wedding, in particular, has been rated “odious” by the ADL and should only be watched by mature individuals wearing an N95 mask carefully affixed over both eyes.
But why should I have to flag my own videos, when my hard-earned tax money is going to DHS censors who are supposed to be flagging them for me? I’m actually kind of miffed that the Disinfo Squad has not yet targeted my work. I know they’ve only been in existence for a few weeks, but still…haven’t they noticed that I’ve been challenging the official narrative of just about everything for almost 20 years? Don’t my videos deserve official DHS warning labels, not just my homemade ones? What am I doing wrong?
I am also extremely annoyed that Paypay hasn’t yet frozen my account and stolen my entire balance, like they’ve done or threatened to do to Consortium News and MintPress. Yes, I know Consortium News has a bigger audience, and MintPress does more thorough investigative work, but all things considered I think my stuff is at least as problematic as theirs. Doesn’t Paypal realize they need to ruin me financially and force me to spend my last wad of cash on an AK-47 and a revenge plan? (Just kidding, Paypal, I wouldn’t really do anything like that, at least not unless I became mentally unbalanced after undergoing an experimental injection, which won’t happen until hell freezes over.)
And then there is Twitter. What is the use of Twitter paying Censor-in-Chief Vijaya Gadde \$17 million per year if she isn’t going to boot people like me off the platform? Heck, for even half that much money I’d be happy to boot myself off Twitter! It’s kind of humiliating that an idiot like Donald Trump was considered worth ejecting from Twitter, and the Hunter Biden laptop story was deemed worth banning, whereas none of my bombshell stuff seems to have even raised one of Vijaya Gadde’s dark and sultry eyebrows. If that nasty white male heterosexual misogynist Elon Musk really does fire her, she won’t get any sympathy from me.
And however many millions a year the top YouTube censor is raking in, they’re not doing their job either. Why, oh why, can I never seem to get a third strike, leading to the permanent deletion of the thousands of hours of footage I’ve been posting for well-nigh 15 years? All they ever do is shadowban me and give me strike one and then strike two, but never strike three. All kinds of people who are vastly less outrageously subversive than I am manage to get their YouTube channels mercilessly nuked. So, once again, what am I doing wrong?
And then there is the ADL, which issued repeated attacks on me throughout 2015, 2016, and 2017. Now it seems like I haven’t heard from them in ages. Why not? I thought we were old friends!
I used to get condemned by the media as an evil person who should never, ever talk to presidential and vice-presidential candidates like Ajamu Baraka and Marianne Williamson. I used to get pilloried by illustrious people like the president of France. As recently as Valentine’s Day, 2021, I was nominated as one of the world’s eight leading “superspreaders of COVID conspiracy theories” by the Atlantic Council and the Associated Press.
And now I can’t even get one measly little DHS warning label attached to my video! I guess I’ll have to complain to DHS Disinfo Squad Commissar Nina Jankowicz:
Hey Nina, you adorable Mary Poppins lookalike and governess of ungovernable naughty children on social media, can’t you at least spare a couple of minutes to give my work a well-deserved official US government spanking?