From the Babylon Bee:
THE GREAT WHITE NORTH— …According to childhood friend “Smokey,” Trudeau used to be known as “Corn Pop,” and was a “bad dude” who ran around with “a bunch of bad boys.”
One day, Corn Pop and Smokey were hanging at the community pool/hockey rink when a white lifeguard named Joey B scolded Corn Pop for not following the rules. The incident escalated to the point where Corn Pop and the gang waited outside by Joey’s moose with razors, ready to “cut that cracker down.” Joey B came out with a sharpened icicle, ready for action, but instead of an altercation, something happened: Joey apologized for making a derogatory comment about Corn Pop’s ethnic hair.
I am returning to my home planet. My work here is complete because you earthlings can now carry on.