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"Yes, Sabrina, There Is a Haven Monahan"
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An exchange in the Letters-to-the-Editor column:

Dear Editor,

I am 42 years old.

Some of my little friends say there is no Haven Monahan.

Papa Jan says, “If you see it in The Times, it’s so.”

Please tell me the truth, is there a Haven Monahan?

Sabrina Rubin Erdely

 

Sabrina, your little friends are wrong. …

Yes, Sabrina, there is a Haven Monahan. He exists as certainly as hate and privilege and patriarchy exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its purpose: to destroy. Alas! How dreary would be the world if there were no Haven Monahan! It would be as dreary as if there were no Sabrinas. There would be no politically correct dogma then, no hoaxes, no slander to make tolerable this existence. We should have no blood libels nor ensuing pogroms, no nights of broken glass.

Not believe in Haven Monahan! You might as well not believe in transgenderism! You might get your Papa Jan to hire interns to watch in all the fraternities during Rush Week to catch Haven Monahan, but even if they did not see Haven Monahan coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Haven Monahan, but that is no sign that there is no Haven Monahan. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see Tawana Brawley being gangraped by white policemen? Of course not, but that’s no proof that Crystal Magnum wasn’t right. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the gangrapes there are unseen and unseeable in the world….

Is it all real? Ah, Sabrina, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Haven Monahan! Thank God he lives and he lives forever. A thousand years from now, Sabrina, nay 10 times 10 thousand years from now, he will continue to make tingle the hamster of womanhood.

Idea lifted from commenter SPMoore8.

 
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  1. I have this crazy notion that Cheateau Heartiste is a group blog and Steve is a contributor. My guess is Steve posts the social science stuff.

  2. Priss Factor [AKA "The Priss Factor"] says:

    I saw Haven Monahan work as a short order cook for Keyser Soze.

    • Replies: @Kyle McKenna
    @Priss Factor

    I saw Haven Monahan drinking a Piña Colada at Trader Vic's. His hair was perfect.

    Replies: @Cloud of Probable Matricide

  3. Priss Factor [AKA "The Priss Factor"] says:

    They are calling it ‘journalistic failure’ when it’s clearly a case of journalistic fraud.

    But this is to be expected when the entire media are filled with Sabrina Rubin Ederlys.

    Just consider the treatment of the Sochi Olympics. The lie printed in the NYT that Russia will arrest ‘gay’ athletes.
    All the lies about WMD in Iraq, the lies about spreading democracy in Libya, the lies about Benghazi, the lies about Iran’s nuclear program, the lies about Putin, the lies about Ferguson, the lies about ‘gay marriage’, the lies about Indiana, the lies about Israeli and Palestinians, and etc.

    And who can forget the totally lopsided coverage in the 2008 election, a total ‘failure’ of journalism that made old Pravda and People’s Daily look objective.

    Of course, the Cons are no better, and if they had the power, they will be spreading their own lies. GOP mendacity on Iran, Netanhayu, and Israel is downright disgusting. And we have guys like Ted Cruz and Hannity saying that Putin wants to recreate the USSR. Fox News willfully left out news about amnesty and distracted dumb American conservatives with stories about ISIS. GOP distracted the American public from its betrayal on amnesty by inviting Netanhayu, the mother of all liars, to address Congress.

    And there was the lie about Iran saying it wants to WIPE ISRAEL OFF THE MAP, which is a total mistranslation, a willful mendacious one at that.

    The like of Jordan Belfort run not only Wall Street but the media. But all their rage and hatred are justified because of Wasp golf clubs and Neo-Nazi fraternities.

    We are living in an empire of lies.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
    @Priss Factor

    ... except, of course, that there were WMD in Iraq. And there were also 22 other reasons in the authorization for use of force.

    When you're pointing out lies you don't have to 'balance' the list by including real things that were called lies by the idiots who are now in power.

    Replies: @Anonymous

    , @Ragno
    @Priss Factor

    Priss, I only wish we could print up your reader-comment on about 100 million leaflets and drop them en masse over every major and minor American city. (That is standard procedure for keeping hope alive among captive peoples in occupied territories, is it not?)

  4. Mangum, not Magnum.

  5. VIDEO: #EmilyRenda Discusses #Jackie’s Fake Rape at Senate Hearing To End Due Process Rights bit.ly/1CnBKd1 #RollingStone

  6. All those blond boys you see getting good grades in college are Haven’s Helpers. The real Haven Monahan flies in on a Gulfstream from his home in Connecticut. If you’re a good girl and leave a keg out for him, he might come to your dorm room and rape you.

  7. Hilarious. Somewhat related, I wonder how much the attitudes, and worldview of the anti-Nuclear Weapons activists have infected the worthless SJW stuff that by comparison (avoiding human extinction through total nuclear war) is trivial pursuit at Leisure World.

    While Ike, who knew something about War, figured the best way to stave off a nuclear war was to be well armed and ready (Operation Chrome Dome — B52s always nuclear armed circling the Arctic) I can at least understand naive religious people who can’t take the Old Time Religion and want a New One to save humanity. Watchmen at least during the 1980s had some sense to it — people were convinced that Reagan would launch a nuclear war that brought humanity to an end.

    Haven Monahan? It shows how trivial everything has become for the left-loonies after the end of the Cold War when their promised Armageddon did not come. Whenever those preacher’s predictions of the World Ending doesn’t come true, they don’t sheepishly go away. The always double down.

  8. Funny, but I do wish people would stop calling her “Crystal Magnum”! This isn’t a porn flick, people!

    • Replies: @Taco
    @Kyle McKenna


    This isn’t a porn flick, people!
     
    Coulda fooled me
  9. Wow. The insight into the psyche that is post-racial, post-America. Thirty years from now, it will still hold up and remain insightful.

  10. The truth is irrelevant.

    What is good for the Jews is all that matters.

    If you doubted that that was so, then the fact that there has been no one fired for advancing the UVA rape hoax is strong evidence that it is the case.

    Hopefully this helps to convince last of the silly philo-semetic conservatives that the days of pandering to Jews in the hope they somehow see the light and embrace Veritas, a Hellenistic/Christian concept vs “What’s good for Jews” and Tukkun Olam(aka SJW delusions) are over.

    The only way to turn things around is to have the courage to get in TWMNBN’s faces and tell them that things are going to have to change.

  11. Lifted from commenter SPMoore8.

    • Replies: @SPMoore8
    @Steve Sailer

    And you did a great job with it, too.

    I see this website like the painting by Repnin, "The Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks". One guy is writing, under his name, the rest of us are commenting pseudonymously from the sidelines, and once in awhile something comes up that's worth working in. (The story of the painting is worth reading, BTW.)

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/50/Ilja_Jefimowitsch_Repin_009.jpg/1024px-Ilja_Jefimowitsch_Repin_009.jpg

    Replies: @Dismayed, @ChrisZ

  12. @Steve Sailer
    Lifted from commenter SPMoore8.

    Replies: @SPMoore8

    And you did a great job with it, too.

    I see this website like the painting by Repnin, “The Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks”. One guy is writing, under his name, the rest of us are commenting pseudonymously from the sidelines, and once in awhile something comes up that’s worth working in. (The story of the painting is worth reading, BTW.)

    • Replies: @Dismayed
    @SPMoore8

    ...one of my favorites, along with "They did not expect him."
    http://www.wga.hu/html_m/r/repin/05repin.html

    , @ChrisZ
    @SPMoore8

    Dear SPMoore8 and Dismayed:

    Thanks for these links, and the stories associated. These paintings are astonishing, but new to me.

    SP's description of this site is delightful.

  13. This would have been a good joke, but I’m afraid it doesn’t mesh well with your other posts or reality. After all, as you’ve been saying all along, one doesn’t see Haven Monahan in the Times. Haven Monahan does exist as an imaginary character, but precisely because of that, the Megaphone would rather pretend it didn’t.

    I understand that Haven Monahan in the joke is a stand-in for the Great White Defiler, in whose existence Erdely and the Megaphone definitely believe. But the name is so toxic now to their world view that they would sooner talk about their GWD obsession explicitly. The joke thus rings false.

  14. @SPMoore8
    @Steve Sailer

    And you did a great job with it, too.

    I see this website like the painting by Repnin, "The Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks". One guy is writing, under his name, the rest of us are commenting pseudonymously from the sidelines, and once in awhile something comes up that's worth working in. (The story of the painting is worth reading, BTW.)

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/50/Ilja_Jefimowitsch_Repin_009.jpg/1024px-Ilja_Jefimowitsch_Repin_009.jpg

    Replies: @Dismayed, @ChrisZ

    …one of my favorites, along with “They did not expect him.”
    http://www.wga.hu/html_m/r/repin/05repin.html

  15. In re Sarah Rubin Erdely, I’m reminded of the movie Casino and Robert De Niro’s reaction to the three slot machine jackpots and the hapless slots manager (played by Joe Bob Briggs):

    Listen, if you didn’t know you’re bein’ scammed, you’re too fuckin’
    dumb to keep this job. If you did know, you were in on it. Either way,
    you’re out!

    Unless you work for Rolling Stone!

  16. @Priss Factor
    I saw Haven Monahan work as a short order cook for Keyser Soze.

    Replies: @Kyle McKenna

    I saw Haven Monahan drinking a Piña Colada at Trader Vic’s. His hair was perfect.

    • Replies: @Cloud of Probable Matricide
    @Kyle McKenna

    Owww - uuuh!

  17. 1861 Indianapolis
    “Providence sometimes turns even our most foolish acts into real blessings, as it often confounds our wisest into follies. Our City Hospital is a striking illustration. When it was commenced there was no need of it. By the time it was completed it was abandoned, and lewd women and vagabond men turned it into a monstrous brothel. It seemed likely to turn out a nuisance so gross as to justify its destruction and make it necessary to spend a few hundred dollars to tear down what it cost $30,000 to erect. But the war came, and with it the gathering of forces and its accompanying evils and sickness. There were but very inadequate accommodations in the camp for the sick; none in fact, for the time. The City Hospital seemed a special providence, sent in the very nick of time.”

    It was so bad the war was an improvement.

  18. • Replies: @fish
    @Clyde


    ‘She actually said, “This book will bring shame on our family”.

     

    That's funny.

    Shame?? These days?

    I'm reminded of the P.J. O'Rourke line...."if you say a modern celebrity is an adulterer, a pervert and a drug addict, all it means is that you've read his autobiography."

    Shame.......Ha....already down the Memory Hole!
  19. The Columbia School of Journalism report on the U-Va rape hoax is great reading. What a story! Her hunger for accuracy at any cost leads our hero and intrepid journalist Sabrina Rubin Erdely to smash through the lies and discover the truth behind the deceitful “A Rape on Campus”. Following the ups and downs in Rubin-Erdely’s relentless jihad for verifiable facts was so enthralling that I ALMOST forgot that Sabrina Rubin Erdely was actually the author of the original story.

    Almost…

    So back in the day when The Times (of London) demonstrated that “The Protocols of the Elders of Zion” was a fraud, did they tell the story of proving the Protocols false from the point of view of the Czarist intelligence agent who originally wrote it ?

  20. @Kyle McKenna
    @Priss Factor

    I saw Haven Monahan drinking a Piña Colada at Trader Vic's. His hair was perfect.

    Replies: @Cloud of Probable Matricide

    Owww – uuuh!

  21. If I was a rich editor of a conservative publication, I would commission Steven Glass to write an investigative piece on Erdely’s entire suspicious portfolio if he would do it. Who better to recognize story telling masquerading as journalism?

  22. Crystal Magnum. Now that’s a name.

    If it was a movie it would be someone played by Pam Grier, or maybe a porn actress with a strap on.

  23. I saw Haven Monahan drinking cappuccino at an Italian restaurant with an Oriental woman.

  24. The Grauniad believes there was a “victim”. I don’t think it’s referring to the frat.
    http://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2015/apr/06/jackie-uva-rape-details-rolling-stone-report

  25. CNN Money: No one fired at Rolling Stone. Really?
    http://money.cnn.com/2015/04/06/media/rolling-stone-no-firings/index.html

    Would the rest of the mainstream media have let this slide if they could have? Yes, I think so.

  26. @Clyde
    off topic___ http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-3027066/Mindy-Kaling-s-brother-claims-famous-sister-says-brought-shame-family-posing-black-man-med-school-admissions.html

    He got into medical school by posing as a black man

    Replies: @fish

    ‘She actually said, “This book will bring shame on our family”.

    That’s funny.

    Shame?? These days?

    I’m reminded of the P.J. O’Rourke line….”if you say a modern celebrity is an adulterer, a pervert and a drug addict, all it means is that you’ve read his autobiography.”

    Shame…….Ha….already down the Memory Hole!

  27. @SPMoore8
    @Steve Sailer

    And you did a great job with it, too.

    I see this website like the painting by Repnin, "The Reply of the Zaporozhian Cossacks". One guy is writing, under his name, the rest of us are commenting pseudonymously from the sidelines, and once in awhile something comes up that's worth working in. (The story of the painting is worth reading, BTW.)

    http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/5/50/Ilja_Jefimowitsch_Repin_009.jpg/1024px-Ilja_Jefimowitsch_Repin_009.jpg

    Replies: @Dismayed, @ChrisZ

    Dear SPMoore8 and Dismayed:

    Thanks for these links, and the stories associated. These paintings are astonishing, but new to me.

    SP’s description of this site is delightful.

  28. I dreamed I saw Haven Monahan last night
    Alive as you and me.

  29. Does Jackie own the copyright to Haven Monahan or could Tom Wolfe use him?

  30. Anonymous • Disclaimer says:
    @Priss Factor
    They are calling it 'journalistic failure' when it's clearly a case of journalistic fraud.

    But this is to be expected when the entire media are filled with Sabrina Rubin Ederlys.

    Just consider the treatment of the Sochi Olympics. The lie printed in the NYT that Russia will arrest 'gay' athletes.
    All the lies about WMD in Iraq, the lies about spreading democracy in Libya, the lies about Benghazi, the lies about Iran's nuclear program, the lies about Putin, the lies about Ferguson, the lies about 'gay marriage', the lies about Indiana, the lies about Israeli and Palestinians, and etc.

    And who can forget the totally lopsided coverage in the 2008 election, a total 'failure' of journalism that made old Pravda and People's Daily look objective.

    Of course, the Cons are no better, and if they had the power, they will be spreading their own lies. GOP mendacity on Iran, Netanhayu, and Israel is downright disgusting. And we have guys like Ted Cruz and Hannity saying that Putin wants to recreate the USSR. Fox News willfully left out news about amnesty and distracted dumb American conservatives with stories about ISIS. GOP distracted the American public from its betrayal on amnesty by inviting Netanhayu, the mother of all liars, to address Congress.

    And there was the lie about Iran saying it wants to WIPE ISRAEL OFF THE MAP, which is a total mistranslation, a willful mendacious one at that.

    The like of Jordan Belfort run not only Wall Street but the media. But all their rage and hatred are justified because of Wasp golf clubs and Neo-Nazi fraternities.

    We are living in an empire of lies.

    Replies: @Anonymous, @Ragno

    … except, of course, that there were WMD in Iraq. And there were also 22 other reasons in the authorization for use of force.

    When you’re pointing out lies you don’t have to ‘balance’ the list by including real things that were called lies by the idiots who are now in power.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
    @Anonymous

    even bush doesn't dare claim there were wmd in iraq

  31. @Anonymous
    @Priss Factor

    ... except, of course, that there were WMD in Iraq. And there were also 22 other reasons in the authorization for use of force.

    When you're pointing out lies you don't have to 'balance' the list by including real things that were called lies by the idiots who are now in power.

    Replies: @Anonymous

    even bush doesn’t dare claim there were wmd in iraq

  32. Anonymous • Disclaimer says:

    “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”

    Pity no one but the innocent will pay any true price for this. Rolling Stone should close its doors, the article’s author and Stone editors should become unemployable (at best).

    But we live in Alice’s Wonderland now.

    • Replies: @Jack D
    @Anonymous

    The fat lady has not sung yet. The fraternity has announced its intention to file suit. The Duke lacrosse boys received very significant settlements (reportedly $20 million to each of the 3 charged players).

  33. “An imaginary cause is capable of producing the most serious and mischievous effects.” — Gibbon

  34. @Anonymous

    “A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.”
     
    Pity no one but the innocent will pay any true price for this. Rolling Stone should close its doors, the article's author and Stone editors should become unemployable (at best).

    But we live in Alice's Wonderland now.

    Replies: @Jack D

    The fat lady has not sung yet. The fraternity has announced its intention to file suit. The Duke lacrosse boys received very significant settlements (reportedly $20 million to each of the 3 charged players).

  35. @Kyle McKenna
    Funny, but I do wish people would stop calling her "Crystal Magnum"! This isn't a porn flick, people!

    Replies: @Taco

    This isn’t a porn flick, people!

    Coulda fooled me

  36. @Priss Factor
    They are calling it 'journalistic failure' when it's clearly a case of journalistic fraud.

    But this is to be expected when the entire media are filled with Sabrina Rubin Ederlys.

    Just consider the treatment of the Sochi Olympics. The lie printed in the NYT that Russia will arrest 'gay' athletes.
    All the lies about WMD in Iraq, the lies about spreading democracy in Libya, the lies about Benghazi, the lies about Iran's nuclear program, the lies about Putin, the lies about Ferguson, the lies about 'gay marriage', the lies about Indiana, the lies about Israeli and Palestinians, and etc.

    And who can forget the totally lopsided coverage in the 2008 election, a total 'failure' of journalism that made old Pravda and People's Daily look objective.

    Of course, the Cons are no better, and if they had the power, they will be spreading their own lies. GOP mendacity on Iran, Netanhayu, and Israel is downright disgusting. And we have guys like Ted Cruz and Hannity saying that Putin wants to recreate the USSR. Fox News willfully left out news about amnesty and distracted dumb American conservatives with stories about ISIS. GOP distracted the American public from its betrayal on amnesty by inviting Netanhayu, the mother of all liars, to address Congress.

    And there was the lie about Iran saying it wants to WIPE ISRAEL OFF THE MAP, which is a total mistranslation, a willful mendacious one at that.

    The like of Jordan Belfort run not only Wall Street but the media. But all their rage and hatred are justified because of Wasp golf clubs and Neo-Nazi fraternities.

    We are living in an empire of lies.

    Replies: @Anonymous, @Ragno

    Priss, I only wish we could print up your reader-comment on about 100 million leaflets and drop them en masse over every major and minor American city. (That is standard procedure for keeping hope alive among captive peoples in occupied territories, is it not?)

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