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The Atlantic: “the Armpits of White Boys”
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Thank you very much, The Atlantic, for your suggestion for my reading pleasure, but maybe I’ll just take a pass on reading your short story “The Armpits of White Boys.”

Let me guess, this story is by a gay South Asian. It explores how his lust for white boys complicates his properly hating them for their race.

 
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  1. Rob McX says:

    Anyone who spells his name in lower case has to be a pretentious jerk.

  2. D. K. says:

    ***

    Provost Visiting Writer – Fiction (Visiting Assistant Professor)
    [email protected]

    hurmat kazmi is a writer from Karachi, Pakistan. their work has been published in The New Yorker and McSweeney’s, and is forthcoming from Granta and American Short Fiction. a graduate of the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, they are currently the Provost Visiting Writer in Fiction at the University of Iowa.

    ***

    https://english.uiowa.edu/people/hurmat-kazmi-0

  3. Let me guess, this story is by a gay South Asian. It explores how his lust for white boys complicates his properly hating them for their race.

    So he’s Arthur C Clarke or Leyland Stevenson in reverse? Are we now a pale Ceylon?

  4. This stuff is amazing to read.

    This piece deals with an Asian gal who can’t stop sleeping with white men.

    Must be tough.

    https://globalhobo.com.au/2020/06/29/fucking-my-oppressors/

    Here I am, on my knees for a white man.

    Throwback to 50 years ago, and the context of this statement would have meant I was about to be beheaded, or shot, or whatever else occurred during the Vietnam war. But it’s 2020, and as the world slowly comes to terms with the breadth of its internalised racism, I’m facing my own conflict. As I stand in the literal face of my oppressors, I begin to analyse how I, an Asian woman, can come to terms with being continuously dominated by white men… in the bedroom.

  5. Altai says:

    Let me guess, this story is by a gay South Asian. It explores how his lust for white boys complicates his properly hating them for their race.

    I don’t know about fiction but there are plenty of personal accounts of Asian women writing about this. My fav is one where she is talking about how ‘problematic’ it is she is engaged to her white fiance. I’m sure her soon to be in-laws loved reading it.

    In general Asians writing ‘woe is me’ articles about oppression in America remind me of all the new communities online where actually privileged teenage white girls try to find something about themselves that is ‘oppressed’ like how ‘oppressed’ ‘asexuals’ like them are.

    I’m An Asian Woman Engaged To A White Man And, Honestly, I’m Struggling With That
    https://web.archive.org/web/20190209075505/https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/unlearning-asian-fetish_us_5c547bb1e4b09293b203b7ed

    “Oh, God, another Asian girl/white boy couple,” I groan, dropping my fiancé’s hand.

    He hates it when I do this. So do I, really. I know it’s unkind and self-loathing, but every time I see another couple of our racial makeup, a little part of me sinks. We live in San Francisco, so this dip is as common as the hills. In these moments, I wish we were anything else ― that he were my gay best friend or we were startup co-founders, that he were Asian and I were white, that we were exquisitely ambiguous races, or that I could sink like my feelings into the sidewalk, be a little worm, and date whomever I want without considering social perception.

    Shame is neither the wisest nor most mature part of oneself, but it still has a voice. “Stop it you guys!” my shame wants to say to these other couples. “Can’t you see the more of us there are, the worse it looks?”

    “It” meaning the prevalent trend of Asian women seeming to end up with white men. “It” meaning the perpetuation of Asian fetish.

    The first time I heard the term ”Asian fetish,” I was the only Chinese kid in a tiny school. Other students in my class had been pairing up to date since fifth grade, exchanging love notes and making each other Alanis Morissette mixtapes. I waited for my ”Jagged Little Pill” cassette, but nothing came in fifth grade. Or sixth. Or seventh. Or eighth.

    Finally, in ninth grade, I got an email on Valentine’s Day from a sporty, popular boy. The subject: DON’T SHOW THIS TO ANYONE. The body: a truly terrible poem asking me to be his girlfriend. “Oh, my God,” was all I could think. “Someone likes me!” Who cares if his grammar left something to be desired! I got on Instant Messenger and said yes.

    Due to it’s obvious peak-SJWism, more the fact she felt comfortable writing it under her own name, including a picture of her fiance and having it published prominently, got criticised. So she got to double dip, writing another piece.

    I Wrote About My Relationship With My White Fiancé and Here’s How Trolls Responded
    https://nextshark.com/tria-chang-white-fiance-trolls/amp/

    As someone who writes personal narratives, I feel a certain safety in focusing my work on my own life: there are many things I’m not expert in – foreign policy, economics, riding a bike – but I’m the definitive expert of what I’ve experienced and how it has shaped my perspective. There is a safe feeling also in that people can get upset at you for a hard-hitting opinion piece, but not for simply sharing a little slice of your life. Or so I thought.

    Tell me you’re a Tumblr user who loves Harry Potter without telling me that. This woman is a perfect example of how certain groups have just not been socialised how to work in multicultural societies. She wouldn’t do anything she’d been taught is ‘rude’ in real life but she doesn’t understand how her piece with it’s carefree lament that she was marrying a white guy, wasn’t actually pro-social in a functional multi-cultural society. (In Singapore they clamp down on any public slurs or fun at the expense of any groups) If a white person wrote about how uncomfortable or exposed they felt walking around with their spouse of another race, what do you think the response would be? Imagine if they then wrote that it made them feel ashamed and question their spouse’s attraction to them as a person or as a fetish. She hasn’t learned that in a functional multi-cultural society you’re supposed to suppress your inner thoughts and feelings.

    And due to it’s small number, the racial or ethnic preferences of white gay men is allowed to come under the kind of fire I assume white women will be under in 5-8 years.

  6. @D. K.

    Do they write about the inglorious South Asian custom of bacha bazi?

  7. This photo is repulsive.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
    , @Alden
  8. The first time I read that, I thought it said “… hating them for their rice.”

  9. @White Guy In Japan

    The Atlantic, with the kindler, woker Penthouse Forum, now, with longer letters.

  10. SFG says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    Back when I was on OKCupid, every other woman whose preference was ‘be tied up ions bed’ (versus ‘do the tying’, which is super rare, or ‘avoid bondage altogether ‘) a feminist who mentioned power relations somewhere in her profile.

    • Replies: @SFG
    , @YetAnotherAnon
    , @Not Raul
  11. SFG says:
    @SFG

    In, not ions.

    Yes, the nerdy chicks do tend to be on the kinkier side, but the site wasn’t going to screw up that badly…

    • Replies: @Intelligent Dasein
  12. @Bardon Kaldian

    Zoom out, Bardon. She’s got a nice rack at least.

    • Replies: @Jim Christian
  13. He’s from Karachi. Not quite the armpit of Pakistan, but –

    https://www.britannica.com/place/Karachi/History

    “Karachi was connected directly with the hinterland when the railway line was extended from Kotri in 1878 to join the Delhi-Punjab railway system at Multān. In 1886 the Karachi Port Trust was established as the port authority, and between 1888 and 1910 the East Wharf—186,000 feet in length—was constructed. When the Punjab emerged as the granary of India in the 1890s, Karachi became the region’s principal outlet. By 1914 it had become the largest grain exporting port of the British Empire.

    After World War I, manufacturing and service industries were installed. By 1924 an aerodrome had been built, and Karachi became the main airport of entry to India. The city became the provincial capital of Sindh in 1936.

    With the creation of Pakistan in 1947, Karachi became not only the capital and premier port of the new country but also a centre for industry, business, and administration. Although Rawalpindi became the interim capital in 1959, before the capital permanently moved to Islamabad in 1969, Karachi maintained its preeminence as Pakistan’s business and industrial hub. In a development typical of many postcolonial megacities, this premier economic status subsequently contributed to an enormous increase in Karachi’s population, as a huge influx of job-seeking immigrants from rural areas nearly doubled the city’s size in the final two decades of the 20th century. With the city’s infrastructure already overburdened to the breaking point, fully one-third of these new arrivals were forced to take up residence in urban shantytowns known as katchi abadis, which ordinarily lacked power, running water, or sanitation. The delivery of basic city services remained an ongoing problem for Karachi into the 21st century.

    The final quarter of the 20th century also brought a huge wave of urban violence and crime to Karachi, in the form of ethnic violence between native Sindhis and more recent immigrants from India, the muhājirs, and in an increased rate of both simple crime and organized brigandage. The severity of lawlessness in Karachi prompted the government to initiate a military crackdown on crime in the city in 1992, but this campaign did not begin to see significant results until the end of that decade.

    Violence and crime continued to plague the city into the beginning of the 21st century. Conflict between ethnic factions was further exacerbated by a rapid influx of Pashtuns from the north. In 2013 the national government launched a new military crackdown. That same year the provincial government of Sindh enacted reforms that decentralized the city’s municipal services and gave the province additional oversight. Karachi saw a dramatic decline in crime by the end of the decade, but confusion over who was responsible for financing and providing certain basic services left infrastructure and sanitation deteriorating.”

  14. Clyde says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    Very good! Another score for white men, and right after our score with Kyle Rittenhouse, just in time for Thanksgiving. When we Pilgrims scored massively against the Indians, by eating all their cornmeal, oatmeal, turkeys, cranberries and Squaws.

    • LOL: Kylie
  15. @SFG

    In, not ions.

    Yes, the nerdy chicks do tend to be on the kinkier side, but the site wasn’t going to screw up that badly…

    “Hey, when I said I was into free radicals, I didn’t mean that!

  16. Anon[390] • Disclaimer says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    I’m not sure how this fits in with the Yellow Cab thing:

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yellow_cab_(stereotype)

  17. Alden says:
    @D. K.

    So much for any conservative dream of a conservative haven in the Midwest.

    • Replies: @The Wild Geese Howard
  18. Alden says:
    @Altai

    Wait till the couple has kids. Some are obviously mixed race. But most look White until you take a good look at the bone structure around their eyes. Asian women go for the fairest skin and lightest hair possible. Which means some of the kids have brown not black hair.

    And with the father’s European surnames, the kids are pass for White.

    I don’t believe the story. I’m sure she’s had relationships with Whites. But I doubt she’s really engaged to one. Ask any Asian teen or young woman why she dates Whites. The usual answer is with a girlish whine; “ I don’t want to marry someone like my faatherrrr”.

    Reason Asian parents pressure sons to date and marry Asians of the same race and clan and ancestral village has to do with not snobbery but a desire to preserve the ancestral biological heritage. Lots of arranged marriages for Asian sons. Not forced marriages but much pressure and huge dowries from the man’s parents. Ranging from a paid for new, not used car to a down payment on a California or NYC house

    As for marriage of a daughter this old Chinese proverb is how Asians feel about daughters.
    Marrying off a daughter is like throwing away dirty dishwater.

    • Replies: @YetAnotherAnon
  19. Alden says:
    @Bardon Kaldian

    At least it’s a photo of armpit hair. Not other body hair.

  20. Gorgeous writing

    It is about how white supremacy permeates and effects everything even romance

    I watch a lot of porn and my fave is Black Male on white female

    We need to be honest with ourselves and not dismissive of challenging topics

    I mean at this point there are literally two categories of American citizens:
    1. People that believe in science, chemistry, math, experts in their fields, lessons learned from fighting a global pandemic 100 YEARS AGO or…
    2. You are MAGA

    • LOL: Alfa158
  21. @Achmed E. Newman

    I’m missing you here, Acchie. The picture at the top is a skinny White SHOULDER, topped with a liberal (heh) dollop of snatch-hair scissored off the pubes of the author, a pan-faced, flat-assed oriental chick.

    And so I must axe, where’s the rack? Funny too, the accusations by oriental ‘women’, college educated in the U.S., the NASTIEST feminist broads in the West, that we White boys have yellow fever for oriental snatch. Their flaccid snatches are the same as every other flaccid snatch, you just gotta find the right position. So what fever? Meanwhile I have been to 4 or 5 weddings here in New England the past two years where the oriental princess married the nerdy, high-EARNING White boy engineering major from MIT working for GE Nuclear in Seabrook, NH. I’m going to accuse the oriental girls that marry these mopes of Money-fever. Or White dick fever, since oriental fashion among yellow women is to demean their own yellow men by showing a 1-inch gap between thumb and index finger.

    Oriental chicks are like scorpions, you get the snatch, never marry them, and try to get out alive. Marry them and you’re guaranteed a ‘not haaaaaaapy’ divorce. Happy Thanksgiving, Acchie, Steve and the rest of yez.

    • Replies: @SFG
    , @Achmed E. Newman
  22. Cortes says:

    I imagine that the oxters of that Parisian waitress so memorably described recently by ?J McG must’ve been, er, fragrant.

    • Replies: @Expletive Deleted
  23. @SFG

    In one of Nancy Friday’s (she died childless btw – all those orgasms and no babies) fantasy books (I remember the feminist girls at uni asking “is she making these up?”) there’s an interview with a “dom” male who says that feminists often make the best slaves.

    • Replies: @SFG
  24. “White Boy” is a racist slur, often accompanied with violence against white males. It’s time to hold media businesses accountable for promoting racist violence.

  25. Pakistan is the armpit of the subcontinent, and that’s saying something.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  26. @White Guy In Japan

    Have they managed to slip a part in for Andrew Anglin?

  27. SF says:

    Carleton Coon would classify her as caucasian. Her mother tongue is probably an Indo-European language.

  28. this story is by a gay South Asian.

    Ding ding ding.

    It explores how his lust

    Oh, no, as Alex used to say. It’s “their.”

    Pretty good for an aging Boomer.

    • LOL: Old Prude
  29. @Altai

    another whitey with yellow fever, what do yo do scour the internet looking for articles like the huff post and next shark one , console yourselves with articles like that because 99.999999% of your type cant get asian women in the US ,this is why you desprately look for jobs to teach english in china to scam and take advantage of naive chinese women and since there is a limited jobs teaching english in china too much demand not enough supply ,you go whoring in se asia.

    • Replies: @Getaclue
  30. In the immortal words of Krusty the Klown: “Uggggh, that just kept going, huh?”

  31. Anonymous[191] • Disclaimer says:
    @Altai

    “I’m An Asian Woman Engaged To A White Man And, Honestly, I’m Struggling With That”
    Pretty good clickbait but to get to the big leagues she will have to step up her game… Maybe something along the lines of…
    ” African American women are so lucky because white guys don’t give them a second glance?”

    • Replies: @Alden
    , @Colin Wright
  32. SFG says:

    I read the thing (rolling my eyes at the title). It was a not-awful tale of cultural alienation by a South Asian gay exchange student and the protagonist isn’t totally sympathetic. (I sympathized with the host family.) The whole auto fiction (writing a fictionalized version of yourself) trend is pretty dumb IMHO, but that’s one way to avoid being accused of appropriation.

    It’s kind of depressing this is what replaced Hemingway and Cheever, but all cultures rise and fall I guess.

  33. What’s the relative size of the anti-perspirants’ market compared to deoderants? I’m betting the second is bigger.

  34. ic1000 says:

    I clicked, then read “The Armpits of White Boys,” a new short story from hurmat kazmi in the December issue of The Atlantic.

    It’s a long not short account — an account of suffering through a year as an exchange high-school student, archly written in the third person. Okay, okay, “alienated,” as the reader, I get it, thanks so much.

    From this lookback, adolescent kazmi’s fraught relationship with his upper-class Karachi upbringing meant that he didn’t benefit much from this exposure to small-town California life. He was full of self-pity, impulsive, and quick to blame others for the strife he generated.

    The novelette’s happy ending is that kamzi returns home to Pakistan. Good luck to him as he grows into manhood, dealing with Sunni strictures against homosexuality, his ruminations over armpits, a querulous disposition, and the aforementioned alienation.

    Wait — hurmat kazmi is a graduate of the Iowa Writers’ Workshop, they are currently the Provost Visiting Writer in Fiction at the University of Iowa? After flunking out of an exchange program, how did he garner enough points to earn a visa?

    That kazmi chooses to be in the United States, and that the United States permitted him to immigrate — these two facts overshadow whatever meaning the Atlantic’s editors ascribe to his selective and self-serving memoir.

    Separate nations.

    • Replies: @ic1000
    , @Escher
  35. prosa123 says:

    You Tube celebrity Wonderhussy explains why she doesn’t shave her armpits:

  36. ic1000 says:
    @ic1000

    The Atlantic’s editors surely saw this tweet before choosing to publish hurmat kazmi. How did it affect their decision?

  37. Gabe Ruth says:
    @Altai

    Surprising that “you’re not allowed to have racial preferences” was preceded in the mainstream by “you’re not allowed to have genital and/or assigned at birth sex preferences”, but that’s probably white male logic speaking.

    It’s a fairly logical extention of diversity is our strength nonsense in a situation where promiscuity is expected, but your conflicted chinkette shows a further extension that might be useful to people who desire a return to sanity. If it’s impossible to have a serious relationship with someone of another race that isn’t problematic, the obvious solution is to avoid interracial relationships. Even better if this only applies to huwhyte people, obviously (sorry Anglin).

  38. Catdog says:

    Thanks for sharing this, Steve. (sarcasm)

  39. Sounded familiar.
    Then while I was reconditioning an old Imperial-size radiator (if you know where, fittings are still gettable) I remembered.
    My Beautiful Laundrette. Saw it new (pathetic beta simping will make a young man do almost anything). She hated it too, having been pant’s-wettingly keen to and dragging me along, ha ha. Much ale was required thereafter, and not just by her.

    IIRC it’s the usual dominant paki top (I won’t say male, you should see the absolute state of the ones we get in UK) and mysteriously compliant, handsome and ripped Anglo boy.

    On the laundrette’s opening day, Omar confronts Johnny on his fascist past. Johnny, feeling guilty, tells him that though he cannot make it up to him, he is with him now.

    Loozzolozllz. That has never happened, I’d stake my ancient, very un-nazi life on it.

    Both these excrescences have racist homo paki wish fulfilment/revenge fantasy writ large and throbbing all over them.
    It’s what they can’t have that they desire the most.

    • Agree: Cortes
    • Replies: @Ray P
  40. Escher says:
    @D. K.

    I am sure they is free to flaunt their homosexuality and gender fluidity in the woke and welcoming neighborhoods of Karachi and Lahore.

    • Replies: @Alan Mercer
  41. Old Prude says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    My older sister gave me a subscription to the Atlantic as a gift. I tried it for a year, then confessed the magazine did not appeal to my sensibilities. Now, times eleven.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
    , @ATBOTL
  42. Let me guess, this story is by a gay South Asian.

    Ding ding ding!

  43. @SFG

    It’s kind of depressing this is what replaced Hemingway and Cheever, but all cultures rise and fall I guess.

    At least it’s legible. I can’t imagine what it’s like for Anglophones who’ve ill-advisedly started to dredge through Irvine Welsh’s oeuvre. And I used to live at the foot of Pennywell, right across from “the worst toilet in the world”, so I could do ra dialect nae borra.

    I recognised the “autofiction” bit. The chief characters in the chronicles of the schemes are inverted, nihilistic male MarySues surrounded by other Marvel antiheroes/projections, with a mysteriously willing and unfeasibly high-SMV hoor or two in orbit.
    Very Roman Catholic.

  44. Fox says:
    @D. K.

    Does this name represent a single writer or the brand name of a writers’ guild?

    • Replies: @NOTA
  45. Ray P says:
    @Expletive Deleted

    I saw that early Daniel Day-Lewis flick in 1985 too and thought about it when reading this post. The married uncle of the Pakistani boy is also having an adulterous relationship with a white woman played by the famous nineteen sixties’ British actress Shirley Anne Field but the uncle’s wife finds out and uses traditional Indian magick to give Field a nasty rash and frighten her off! The film has some moments of truth such as the Pakistani protagonist openly gloating that the white British are worthless, useless and finished and that the country now belongs to the immigrants. It’s sort of about how the immigrants have seized the day in Margaret Thatcher’s Britain and are ambitious, get-ahead entrepreneurs (who import Heroin) while the natives are sunk in apathetic despondency and listlessly kicking trash cans over. Day-Lewis’ Johnny has to choose between his loyalty to his own London working-class pals or his Pakistani lover and the New England he represents.

  46. Alden says:
    @Anonymous

    Her parents probably demanded a too expensive dowry from the parent’s of any Asian man any Asian man that saw her more than 3 times

    Or else he wasn’t the precise clan and tribal village ancestry required

  47. SafeNow says:

    So what fever?

    I will take a stab at this. Although I think it’s obvious. It is NOT the structure of the Asian eyes. Rather, it is a constellation of traits resembling those of pre-feminist women. Things like fairmindedness, empathy, support, responsiveness, an inquiring mind, sensitivity, and non-whaleness. And honoring the elderly. Not so bad. Of course, there are plenty of gals in Iowa, or elsewhere majoring in kindergarten teaching, who fit that bill.

    • Agree: Achmed E. Newman
  48. SFG says:
    @Jim Christian

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Interracial_marriage_in_the_United_States#Marital_stability

    Divorce rates are slightly lower for white-Asian couples than white-white, though even lower for Asian-Asian.

    From the numbers I have seen from dating sites, the reason for the disproportionate WMAF pattern is that Asian women are as likely to date white men as Asian men, but white women discriminate against Asian men.

    https://www.gwern.net/docs/psychology/okcupid/howyourraceaffectsthemessagesyouget.html

    • Agree: Jim Christian
  49. @Jim Christian

    Jim, I was under the impression that this picture was at least supposed to be of a white boy’s armpit, per the headline. My joke to Mr. Kaldian was that perhaps this snatchshot, oops, snapshot could have been of a white chick who doesn’t shave there, one of those hippy or harpy types, who may still happen to have a nice rack. I guess this joke fell flat … tap, tap, rim shot…

    Oh, and how’d the Oriental chick get red, somewhat-curly hair off of … OK, I’m gonna stop right here!

    I don’t have the same opinion of the Oriental girls, Jim, and I try to keep in mind that writers for the NY Times and The Atlantic don’t represent any kind of reality that I ever hope to run into for the rest of my days.

    You too, Jim, on the Happy Thanksgiving!

    Oh, got a post coming tonight that you could read while/if you are traveling on the Jet Blue Scarebus – Happy D.B. Cooper Day!

    It was 50 years ago today,
    when D.B. Cooper taught the banks to pay.
    He was going out the door in style.
    The story’s guaranteed to raise a smile.

    Spoiler alert: I’m as romantic about these things as the next guy, but listen, jumping at night, into the Cascade Mountains, in the Winter… that guy didn’t have a chance in hell, sorry to say, even if he landed safely, not in a tree, and not on the side of a 60 degree slope of ice and rock.

  50. Getaclue says:
    @Rob McX

    The Atlantic is a Vanity Press for Steve Job’s lunatic Lefty wife — she got his cash and has publicly announced she won’t pass it on to the children for some “noble” reason but bought the loser publication to “save” it — without her large \$ infusions the incredible garbage that is The Atlantic would have folded a while back.

    Not to worry the rest of the Garbage Mainslime Media that is also failing is going to get an infusion of over a \$Billion of our Tax Money from Biden and the Neo-Bolsheviks hiding behind him in the new “iNfRAsTrUCtuRe” Bill…clearly they know who their “home team” is….

  51. @White Guy In Japan

    Every single feminist SJW woman of pigment that I know exclusively dates only white guys and usually blue collar white guys who don’t have a PC bone in their bodies at that. It’s hilarious.

    • Agree: New Dealer
  52. @Ray P

    And now they’ve conspired, perjured and lied to destroy English cricket, for their home nation’s advantage and without doubt their own extended family’s profit, “back home”.
    Some sins cannot be washed away with any amount of blood.

    Keep an eye on the relatives’ sudden mysterious, ostentatious prosperity, if possible. It’s not as though they have the sense to invest it out of sight.

  53. Not Raul says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    Here I am, on my knees for a white man.

    [. . .] I’m facing my own conflict. As I stand in the literal face of my oppressors [. . .]

    If she’s on her knees, she isn’t standing.

    She can’t have it both ways.

  54. Not Raul says:
    @SFG

    Back when I was on OKCupid, every other woman whose preference was ‘be tied up ions bed’ (versus ‘do the tying’, which is super rare, or ‘avoid bondage altogether ‘) a feminist who mentioned power relations somewhere in her profile.

    Just imagine some woman, somewhere, thinking, “If only Foucault were straight!”

  55. @Altai

    The gay men who complain about this are always ugly or fat. They lie to themselves and claim they can’t get a date or a hook up with the hunk of their dreams because of their race, but it’s really because they are physically repellent, and attractive gay men of any race have zero issues finding sex or dates.

  56. Hhsiii says:
    @SFG

    Pretty much sums it up. He doesn’t seem to hate the white host family, although the descriptions are a bit gratuitously snobbish.

  57. @Cortes

    Try “mingin’”. Or jist pure blohoorible.
    Had a (belgian or something) “waitress” at a dying tried to-be-upscale eatery in a posh street a few years ago.
    ‘Er indoors was an absolute sucker for those online voucher schemes they tried before each fly-by-night ethnic epicurean emporium was quietly put down by the Revenue.

    She, like m’m’zel above, literally stank. And I don’t mind the odd piss-rotten dosser getting in my face if they stay civil, and explain (embarrassedly, usually, once the patter runs out) that they’d like me to get them a drink from the store.
    Or dogfood.
    Anything else, GTF. Salad? What! Do y’want tae die!?

    I mean she was hoatchin’ with something alive; rank and boggin’. Rotten teeth that near put the romantic candle on the table out from three yards.

    Her haughty condescension to the filthy English paying for grim, microwaved industrial waste (you could see the (clingfilm/saran wrap) (mold/mould) on the top of each dish) was something to behold.
    Also sleeve tattoos. I came close to boaking, and I am no stranger to farm sheds, or seabird cliffs.

  58. @Alden

    “Ask any Asian teen or young woman why she dates Whites. The usual answer is with a girlish whine; “ I don’t want to marry someone like my faatherrrr””

    When I reached years of discretion (took a long time), one of the things that increased the likelihood of a serious relationship with a new girlfriend was if she had obvious respect for her father. A lot of girls don’t seem to (OK, with good reason in some cases).

  59. @SFG

    “Men In Love”, 1980.

    A long time since I’ve read it, but “love” wasn’t the word I’d have used for the contents.

  60. njguy73 says:
    @Rob McX

    It was innovative and cutting-edge when e e cummings did it in the ’20s, but now it’s a cheap way to be different.

  61. @White Guy In Japan

    Here I am, on my knees for a white man.

    Throwback to 50 years ago, and the context of this statement would have meant I was about to be beheaded, or shot

    More likely scrubbing the floor, you scrubber.

    [Oh hory chit! The byline.

    June 29, 2020 · by Linh

    Noo-ooo-oo! Linh what?]

  62. @Old Prude

    My Mom gave my 10 y/o a subscription to Scientific American for his birthday. She means well, no doubt. As woke as these publications are now, I don’t care if it never shows up – so far it hasn’t, due to a glitch in the woke-supply-chain or something. He’d have been better off with another cheap China-made crap toy that lasted about an hour and a half in one piece, but we’re done with all that too.

    • Replies: @SFG
  63. Anonymous[137] • Disclaimer says:
    @D. K.

    Note that Hurmat Kazmi insists on letting all his co-ethnics know that he is a “Syed,” i.e. claiming direct descent from the Prophet.

    This is similar to the common tick among Leftist Indians who contrive in an initial conversation to mention at least five times that they happen to be Brahmin. It really makes no difference to them personally that they happen to be Brahmin. Really, it couldn’t be less important that they are Brahmin. And they merely happened to marry another person who by the merest coincidence is also a Brahmin.

  64. Alfa158 says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    In 1980 some eroded bundles of the ransom money were found on a riverbank downstream from the approximate location where he jumped. No other bills from the ransom ever turned up. (Although some counterfeiters apparently thought it was amusing to use serial numbers from the published list for their product.)
    The general consensus is that Cooper almost certainly died in the jump and the forest swallowed his remains. The area was also affected by the Mount St. Helens eruption so there is little chance any of his remains will ever turn up.

  65. @Alfa158

    That bundle of money was found on a sandbar in the Columbia River or a tributary, as I recall, Alfa. It could have traveled very far from the site of Mr. “Cooper”‘s “landing”.

    I need to look up the location (well, within as good as the guesses go) of the landing, but I believe most of the Mr. St. Helens ash went east and northeast (even Spokane got inches of the stuff, and some made it into the Snake River valley farmland of Idaho!) I think the estimated Cooper landing site was more to the south or southwest of St. Helens.

    Even if his remains stayed fairly intact, there is remote country in which he could remain there for centuries. BTW, there are trees in Spirit Lake (seen ’em myself), NE of the mountain that were blown down by the blast of St. Helens and remain floating around the lake today.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  66. @prosa123

    Armpit hair isn’t ao bad. Hair on legs, face, or body is unacceptable. Also, in the US, I used to not notice hair on arms, but since living in Asia, that’s out too. However, armpit (like”pelvic”) hair is okay. Not the best, but okay.

  67. Anonymous[836] • Disclaimer says:

    I think it is really a strategic mistake for them to merchandise Lawn Boy Lit so aggressively at a time when, uh, connoisseurs of that kind of thing have never had such a, uh, “frictionless” economic ability to support it w/ their dollars. Then it transitions from “Support my right to be me” to “Kneel before Zod” (or “before Zoom” perhaps)—that’s just vulgar and greedy, not to mention megalomaniacal.

  68. @SFG

    It’s kind of depressing this is what replaced Hemingway and Cheever, but all cultures rise and fall I guess.

    But why wasn’t prior literature like that too? The pathetic emotional state on display in so many people and so much writing is strange. Mimicry?

  69. Anonymous[403] • Disclaimer says:
    @D. K.

    I’m at the point of automatically hearing the Dana Carvey church-lady soundbite in my head, i.e. “Well isn’t that special,” when I read these new-style curriculae vitae now

  70. ATBOTL says:
    @Old Prude

    Ah, The Atlantic

    …It was vaguely readable through the mid 90’s. Writing was pompous at times and they started using cringe attempts at hipness by the late 80’s. I remember a piece explaining what young blacks meant by slang words like “diss.” They had some surprisingly honest articles in the early nineties about race and immigration. I believe there was cover story about Camp Of The Saints around the time NAFTA passed.

    It became a joke when they had that article about “gravitas” in the 1996 election campaign as a clearly calculated ploy to de-emphasize policy issues as we moved into peak globalization. Message to wannabe elites: We don’t care about issues now, we just want politicians who look serious and never question anything like a crazy bad person would.

    Then there were the Benetton adds.

  71. @Escher

    they is

    How long until folks have the right to choose their own verbs? They/them/their/are, etc

  72. SFG says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    Point him to Greg Cochran’s blog, not to mention the Winegards and Emil Kierkegaard. Other commenters have other suggestions (Razib Khan maybe).

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  73. @Altai

    ‘Shame is neither the wisest nor most mature part of oneself, but it still has a voice. “Stop it you guys!” my shame wants to say to these other couples. “Can’t you see the more of us there are, the worse it looks?”’

    It’s actually pretty inevitable. On the one hand, Asian (and everyone’s) culture is a lot more arrogant about male versus female supremacy than Western European culture is. Go with a white guy, and you’ll hear ‘and what would you like, honey?’ a lot more.

    On the other hand, blacks really aren’t a good idea.

    So — assuming you’re not into submission but are heterosexual — a white man is definitely an option.

  74. @Ray P

    uses traditional Indian magick to give Field a nasty rash

    fnarr fnarr

    I fancy this, I fancy that, I wanna be so flash.
    I give a little muscle and I spend a little cash.
    But all I get is bitter and a nasty little rash.

    • Replies: @Ray P
  75. Art Deco says:
    @Alfa158

    The area was also affected by the Mount St. Helens eruption so there is little chance any of his remains will ever turn up.

    The eruption was about 40 miles away from the supposed landing zone. The landing zone was SSW of the eruption.

    The ash distribution is here.

  76. @Achmed E. Newman

    “Tommy Wiseau” has never bothered to completely dispel the rumor that he is in fact that selfsame jumper, Mr Cooper.

    I shook the great man’s hand and congratulated him after a showing of his startlingly authentic movie “The Room“.
    One of the kids still has the signed (in silver sharpie) poster up, gained by him at a prior screening.
    They simply could not believe what awesomeness they were witnessing.

    You’re tearing me apart, Lisa!

  77. @Anonymous

    ‘…Pretty good clickbait but to get to the big leagues she will have to step up her game… Maybe something along the lines of…
    ” African American women are so lucky because white guys don’t give them a second glance?”

    Not bad. You’re missing a career.

    • LOL: Alden
  78. @prosa123

    Wow! In Europe, she’d be .. like .. er just about everybody including the grannies, stupid toy dogs and drunk uncles. Only a few high-class whores in France actually shave. Anything.

  79. JimB says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    As I stand in the literal face of my oppressors, I begin to analyse how I, an Asian woman, can come to terms with being continuously dominated by white men… in the bedroom.As I stand in the literal face of my oppressors, I begin to analyse how I, an Asian woman, can come to terms with being continuously dominated by white men… in the bedroom.

    Ahem, size matters.

  80. mc23 says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    And a good time was had by all.

    • Replies: @White Guy In Japan
  81. @Achmed E. Newman

    Mr. Alfa, I take back a little of this, having read that Mr. Cooper was in the area of Lake Merwin. I had read before the A/C was over the high Cascades. This area is not flat by any means, and there are trees galore. However, if he somehow ended up in a decent landing spot, not likely still, he could have been able to walk out.

  82. @SFG

    He’s 10 right now, SFG. It’s not that he couldn’t read those guys, but I’d guess he’d be bored shitless and want to get back to the Warriors cat series. He does occasionally read Peak Stupidity which may or may not be good for him.

  83. Anonymous[403] • Disclaimer says:

    The other day I was writing a short story about a genderqueer Asian womxn and her daily struggles with how absolutely awful White people are, and out of the blue I thought, “You know what America needs? Pakistani faggots who flunk out but get a visa anyway and write fetish articles for universities.”

  84. @White Guy In Japan

    Here I am, on my knees for a white man…

    As I stand in the literal face of my oppressors…

    Well, which is it? Is she a contortionist?*

    Fellatio is just buggery at the other end of the same canal. The wrong one. It’s BDSM on its face.

    So to speak.

    *Anyone else here survive a showing of Shortbus? I never thought that common derogatory imperative was actually possible! My ticket was free, but the film was so bad, I wanted them to refund my bus fare and dinner as well.

    • Replies: @Alden
  85. Ray P says:
    @Expletive Deleted

    In and out of Wandsworth with the numbers on their names
    It’s funny how their missus always look so bleeding same

    I should have mentioned that the young Pakistani homo has to make a choice between his tradition and ancestry much like Daniel Day-Lewis: he has an chronically ill Brahmin father who sits about idle in his London flat overlooking the railway who wants his son to become an Indian intellectual or philosopher rather than following his adulterous uncle into his slightly crooked Arthur Daley lifestyle. His businessman brother has become too Western in his ways hence the white English mistress. But his son wants to be modern and successful and not a lovable loser like his dad. The sister of the protagonist has also found her traditional role in the immigrant family limiting (I think there is talk of an arranged marriage to someone from the old country) and near the end of the film leaves in order to get her feminist freedom.

    The parallels with the Atlantic story extend to the initials of the authors: My Beautiful Laundrette was written by Hanif Kureishi who was a bit of a darling ethnic screenwriter on British TV in the late nineteen eighties.

    • Replies: @Expletive Deleted
  86. NOTA says:
    @Fox

    Like Bourbaki with 50 points lower average IQ.

  87. prosa123 says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    To touch on a topic that’s a perennial favorite here, there’s a good chance that Dan Cooper (the actual name on the ticket, the D.B. was a reporter’s error) was actually a man-turned-woman. Barbara Dayton (1926-2002), born Bobby Dayton and a former Merchant Marine, had undergone a sex-change procedure in 1969. There had been serious complications, with follow-up surgeries required, and being unable to work Dayton was depressed and reliant on welfare benefits.

    After the hijacking, however, everyone who knew Dayton noted that she was in a much improved frame of mind and seemed to have plenty of money. She eventually returned to work and became a librarian for the University of Washington. Sometime around the late 1980’s, Dayton told some people that she had briefly reverted to her former male identity and perpetrated the hijacking as Cooper, knowing that as a woman she’d never be a suspect. She quickly shut up when told that she could still be prosecuted, and never spoke of the issue again.

    Dayton’s claims could of course be dismissed as mere boasting. Then again, there are some good reasons to believe she was truthful. Cooper the hijacker almost certainly had had parachuting experience, was familiar with aviation, and was knowledgeable about the geography of the Puget Sound area. Alone among the most prominent suspects Dayton met all three of these requirements. She was an experienced private pilot who had done a good amount of recreational skydiving and was a lifelong resident of the Seattle area.

    People who knew Dayton also said that she had a bold, risk-taking personality and harbored a deep grudge against the airline industry stemming from her nonstop rejections when applying to airline jobs. Finally, there’s reason to believe that in a man’s clothing and haircut Dayton would have resembled the witness drawings of Cooper. To be sure, one way in which Dayton did not resemble witness descriptions was that she was about two inches shorter than Cooper’s lowest height estimate. All of the witnesses based the height estimated of Cooper while seated, however, and estimates of that nature can be quite inaccurate.

    One issue with Dayton and many other candidates is the way the ransom noted asked for “American currency.” That’s an odd phrasing for an American to use, and may buttress the occasional claim that Cooper was Canadian. Indeed, Dan Cooper (the hijacker’s name of choice, remember) was the hero of a long-running Belgian comic book series about a daredevil pilot. The comics were in French, and never translated in English or sold in the United States, however they were relatively popular at the time in the French-speaking parts of Canada.

    Nonetheless, after having read quite a bit about the hijacking I still believe Dayton is the top suspect.

    • Thanks: Achmed E. Newman
    • LOL: Vinnyvette
    • Replies: @Art Deco
  88. Art Deco says:
    @prosa123

    Critics of the thesis that Cooper was an experienced skydiver maintain that his preparations are inconsistent with that thesis but consistent with the thesis that he was a cargo handler (particularly his knowledge of the minutiae of egress from the aircraft in question).

    I believe a DNA profile was extracted some years back from residue on Cooper’s tie clip. Might be able to feed into Ancestry or 23 and Me.

    IIRC, not one dollar of that money was ever spent. I think that indicates he did not survive the jump.

    • Thanks: Johann Ricke
  89. @Alden

    So much for any conservative dream of a conservative haven in the Midwest.

    Sadly, there is nowhere left to run.

  90. @mc23

    Yup.

    I never messed around with Asian-American women. All of my experiences dating Asian women has been in Asia, hence none of the crazy you see in that article. No weird hangups or insecurities.

  91. Escher says:
    @ic1000

    Good luck to him as he grows into manhood, dealing with Sunni strictures against homosexuality, his ruminations over armpits, a querulous disposition, and the aforementioned alienation.

    Plenty of opportunities to be a compliant, kohl-wearing bottom to a Pashtun in Pakistan.

  92. duncsbaby says:
    @SFG

    Cheever was into white guys too!

  93. KL says:

    Please, somebody explain the story ending to me. Why did the gay foreign exchange kid get rejected by his host family? What did he do?

    • Replies: @ic1000
  94. I will not degrade myself by reading the article, but I would gather a guess the Southeast Asian writer is envious because Asian men have less body and facial hair than white men, and therefore lower testosterone levels. But… High test white male masculinity is toxic right? The left is a microcosm of the female mind, completely addled with cognitive dissonance.

  95. indocon says:

    This writer is employed by English Dept of Univ of Iowa which has drumroll….over 100 paid profs and grad students!! Republicans at state level need to be forced to defund these illiberal sciences across the board where they control states, let these writers find jobs elsewhere.

    Anybody here from Iowa ready to take charge……..nooooh, you are too busy with your college football, guns, grilling, etc etc

  96. Alden says:
    @Reg Cæsar

    She was on her knees to scrub the kitchen floor.

    Like the perfect thin beautiful obedient Asian wife and mother with a big dowry the MEN OF UNZ dream as an alternate to the obese tattooed feminazi White women available to them.

    • LOL: Vinnyvette
  97. Anon[194] • Disclaimer says:
    @D. K.

    I was appalled by the tweet. More appalled if possible by the word “Pakistan”. Let’s hear it for Vlad Dracul-type avengers.

  98. @Ray P

    Old poetic dada gets my vote. These are PRECISELY the people we need.

    The rest of these C-words can eff the eff off (or “orf””). We have plenty of halfwitted, greedy, parasitic retards of our own, thank you very much suh.

    In fact we might be induced to encourage them, the poets an’ a’ that. Make it worth our while. Good poet? Ye are not less than oor kin. Here’s yir passport and some decent boots. And a scholarship for your weans.

    Both mummy’s and daddy’s families have lived here, in the same few contiguous parishes, since, well, like Battle Abbey lists, or Hugh the Wolf’s time in Chester.
    And before that?
    A long, lonely and spindly twig below R-DF13 and H2a1. First seen getting up to their usual shagnanigans together in the 3rd millennium BC. Somewhere about the righthand bend of the Samara River.
    But according to the New Aristocracy, I can never, simply never .. be indigenous. To anywhere.
    FML

  99. ic1000 says:
    @KL

    > somebody explain the story ending to me. Why did the gay foreign exchange kid get rejected by his host family? What did he do?

    The answer is that hurmat kazmi is currently the Provost Visiting Writer in Fiction at the University of Iowa. The point of the plot is that the plot is not the point. The story is a lesson in empathizing with the plight of them, and they’s difficult navigation of the strictures of a homophobic, oppressive, colonialist society.

    Starting at #42, ‘Expletive Deleted’ illustrates by explaining the real meaning of My Beautiful Laundrette.

    kazmi alludes to his younger self making multiple efforts to offend his host mother, host father, and rubes at the hick-town high school. Knowing details would be bad, as that might make you less sympathetic to they’s tween angst.

  100. BB753 says:
    @White Guy In Japan

    Yeah, like there were no consensual sexual acts between white men and Asian women 50 years ago. What an idiot!

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