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The Homie

What America needs is an annual Homicide Awards show where cities compete over their Achievement in the Field of Homicide. Winning mayors would receive from celebrity presenters like O.J., Phil Spector, and Ramzan Kadyrov 2-foot-tall figurines of a criminal firing a Hi-Point held sideways, the Homie.

The point is not to encourage murder, per se, For example, to incentivize poor marksmanship, one Homie could be awarded annually to the city whose shooters are America’s least homicidal, as determined by who has the highest ratio of Wounded to Killed in the weekend shootings tabulations.

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  1. to be awarded annually to the city with America’s least homicidal shooters

    Race to the bottom! Where’s the sport in that?

    • Replies: @bruce county
  2. Cortes says:

    “Homie homini lupus” may be a decent shot at the title.

    • Thanks: kaganovitch
    • LOL: Bardon Kaldian
  3. Steve, I know you think you’re being ironical-cal-cal, but jokes like this just go towards further legitimizing the double standard that blacks enjoy in our society. If black crime is really horrible then it needs to be treated as horrible, not as horrible (and funny!).

    I think that black criminals need to have the book thrown at them and if that means that half the black population ends up in prison, so be it.

    • Agree: usNthem, botazefa
  4. Phil Spector

    The Wall of Rounds.

    • LOL: Bostonvegas
    • Replies: @SunBakedSuburb
  5. Anonymous[848] • Disclaimer says:

    Donald J. Trump @realDonaldTrump 1m Death Rate from Coronavirus is down tenfold!

    OK he’s pounding this good news… but where is the public execution of Saint Fauci? Why isn’t he humiliating Fauci?

    He finally came out blasting the good HYDROXYCHLOROQUINE news — should’ve done it before the holiday can we assume they were arguing all weekend about it? JARED KUSHNER = COCK BLOCKER FROM HELL.

    Trump should bring Flynn Stone & Bannon back into the white house all at once. Just do it.

  6. wren says:
    @Intelligent Dasein

    Unfortunately, black murder is normal.

    I agree with you, it shouldn’t be normal.

    However, that may be racist to say now.

    Clearly blm thinks black murder is normal, or they wouldn’t get so mad if someone mentions it.

    Here’s a really white guy talking about it.

    Seems to be a good guy. blm will probably try to cancel him if anyone notices him saying this.

    • Replies: @Ben Kurtz
    , @El Dato
    , @Gordo
    , @Laine
  7. pseudo says:

    This type of post should be beneath you, sadly it is not..

    • Replies: @Redneck farmer
    , @Hans
  8. MBlanc46 says:
    @Intelligent Dasein

    Yeah, ID, but you know that’s not going to happen. Things are only going to get worse. So we might as well indulge ourselves in a little black humor while we watch the nation that our ancestors built burn.

    • Agree: Mr McKenna, bomag
    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  9. You need to add a Best Dressed category. You could even have sub categories like “Best Use of a Flotation Device”, “Best in Wedding Dress/Formal Wear” , or the ever popular “Most awkward stance to fire a weapon sideways”. Of course the Arabs love that last category too.

    Remember, the harder you jerk the trigger the more power the bullet has! Also cranking those sights all the way to 1000 yards makes hitting close targets a breeze.

  10. @Intelligent Dasein

    Man, nothing is so horrible that it cannot be mocked and made fun of.

    • Agree: Jack Armstrong, fish
  11. Steve, I don’t know if you’ve read it, but I did an article on the bad marksmanship/wounded to dead ratio, based on something you pointed out from the Ben Kurtz Blog on what he called the Leaded Law.My article is called The “Leaded Law” And Mass Shootings—Poor Black Marksmanship Is Saving Lives and there’s a bunch of posts tagged “Leaded Law” here. Below are several possible reasons for this phenomenon from my article.

    Herewith five theories from me—and sixth from Michael Levin.

    Racism—all right, all right, I know, I work here, but what this means is that urban America’s lack of gun rights, gun stores, and gun ranges, while it affects urban whites, is aimed at urban blacks. Blacks don’t have the opportunity to learn to shoot, because Michael Bloomberg won’t let them.
    Urbanization—partly the same thing, partly the fact that most blacks don’t want to live in small towns with normal attitudes towards guns.
    IQ—I wrote in 2009 that differential marksmanship wasn’t necessarily due to IQ, in that people who are quite low on the scale can learn to shoot, but are they clever enough to know they need to learn? Some of the principles behind marksmanship involve geometry, which is why a fraction of an inch off in your sights is three feet off downrange.
    Knowledge of anatomy—You can actually take a course, taught by a medical doctor who’s worked with SWAT teams, on “Tactical Anatomy”, which explains where, on an attackers body, to shoot them in self-defence. Hand-to-hand combat courses have charts explaining where all the organs are (the one at right is the Army’s) but it’s not just that inner city blacks haven’t taken those courses—they may simply have no conception of where the heart is, for example.
    Excitability—Someone who commits a mass shooting is not necessarily by definition excitable, but that’s the way to bet. In his well-known Principles Of Personal Defense, [Full text] self-defence and combat marksmanship guru Lt. Col. Jeff Cooper claimed that “Coolness” was necessary for VDARE.COM" rel="nofollow">winning gunfights started by other people:

    The ability to remain cool under pressure comes more easily to some people than to others. But it is in no sense out of anyone’s reach. In fact, it is the first qualification of a man that Kipling calls for in his immortal poem If. It is illustrated beautifully every time you see a quarterback calmly select and hit his receiver while under the threat of more than one thousand pounds of rock-hard, cat-quick muscle only a step away.

    The quarterbacks Cooper was talking about are almost all white—funny thing, that.

    • Replies: @SafeNow
  12. If the figurine is holding a 9mm sideways in one hand, could he at least be holding a bottle of Cristal in the other hand? That way the figurine is given some class, so its a classy style figurine Homie.

    Maybe even French it up, by calling the figurines “Le Homie”

    Aw yeah. Feelin’ it.

    • Replies: @Known Fact
  13. @Intelligent Dasein

    If the US were split up into ethnic stans – something I would never, ever advocate, not even in jest — the first thing Wakanda would do is exterminate the criminal underclass.

    Can the Homies have an award for “Killer of Youngest Victim”? Asking for a friend.

    • Replies: @Pontius
  14. @MBlanc46

    That’s Black humor, Mr. Blanc. Geeze, woke the heck up!

    • Agree: Jack Armstrong
    • Replies: @MBlanc46
  15. Anon7 says:

    I’d like to see a”Block Party Shooting” category. At one Detroit incident, there were 300 people present, twelve were wounded (not seriously) but only the target individual was killed.

    Plenty of stories to tell, no unnecessary deaths. As for the dead guy, well, the whole community understand that sometimes a motherf***er need to get shot.

  16. You of all people ought to know what’s gonna happen – we’re going to run into the same complaints as usual of you they do it your way, Steve. The cities with the fewest murders are going to be … you know, we’re gonna hear #HomiesTooWhite.

    In the meantime, I nominate Donald Trump for Best Supporting Actor, for his role in signing off on letting loads of criminals out of prison.

  17. Trinity says:

    Were any cast members of The Jeffersons related to good ole Tommy Jefferson?

    We finally got a piece of the piiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeee.

  18. Anonymous[186] • Disclaimer says:

    What America needs is an annual Homicide Awards show where cities compete over their Achievement in the Field of Homicide. Winning mayors would receive from celebrity presenters like O.J. and Phil Spector a 2-foot-tall figurines of a criminal firing a Hi-Point held sideways, the Homie.

    Back in the heyday of the National Lampoon, this premise would have been illustrated on the cover of the magazine. Satire is almost dead, now. Dave Chappelle is still allowed to try, but not many others. It’s our cultural canary in the coal mine, and all writers, as well as Americans in general, should be very concerned.

    Satire means people with half a brain are still allowed to talk.

  19. Kronos says:

    A “Youth Gang” competition is a good idea. Sports is the best example of transferring hormonal rage into something productive.

  20. Ben Kurtz says:

    The “Least Homicidal” award (i.e. highest wounded-to-killed ratio) is clearly a token Affirmative Action category. The long-established Leaded Law tells us that this award will invariably go to black population centers.

  21. SafeNow says:
    @James Fulford

    Those are interesting insights about black marksmanship. My thoughts: I think the gun is held sideways because the instinct to be oppositional and contrarian is so overpowering, that it cannot be resisted even when it is self-defeating. Regarding aiming and drawing practice, black gunmen should pool funds and buy a great laser practice gun and targets for $250. This laser practice also simulates an emergency. My observation is that an emergency, one is not going to “rise to the occasion” with his greatest incredible wonderful amazing aspirational potential. Rather, you are going to default to the level of your training. Thankfully the above practice is not done.

  22. Anon[195] • Disclaimer says:

    Some trolly conservative organization could actually do this. I bet they could find at least one decent cancelled comedian to host it

  23. Ben Kurtz says:

    I’ve watched that video before. The speaker is super-liberal, but he’s smart and has some interesting things to say.

    The real funny thing, though, is that he sounds like an oldster from 30 years ago — complaining bitterly about the awful Rap Music and all that.

  24. Kronos says:

    I’m trying to come up with a joke on how a 38 Special Snubnose ended up in a womb.

    “Oh honey, that barrel was so short I thought it was your penis.”

  25. anon[412] • Disclaimer says:

    Every participant gets a free set of custom sights, too!

  26. @Cortes

    Ahh, but then: Lupi don’t shoot – they don’t even bark, so – I’d prefer rather not to…

  27. I love this idea. May I suggest a complement? How about a website that records every homicide in the country, complete with victim’s pic, suspect or arrestee’s pic and if possible a short description of the circumstances of the crime?

    • Replies: @Steve Sailer
  28. @Tono Bungay

    The LA Times tries to do that for LA County, which is 3% of the entire country, with its Homicide Report started by Jill Leovy.

    But they appear to be running out of money and lagging about three weeks behind lately.

  29. One thing that makes a lot of these overexcited spasms of political concern more common is, I think, the general lack of numeracy among the population. Especially, the inability to distinguish exceptions from normal events, along with the utter incapacity to understand distribution curves. Floyd’s death is imprinted into the brains of millions of people who simply take it as representative. It never enters their head to examine the statistics; it suffices for them that the media dish it up for them and bingo! it’s reality. I’m sure that if the media had videos of a handful of the most mundane black-on-black beatings or shootings and played them over and over, the general populace would be talking like George Wallace in no time.

  30. El Dato says:

    At first looks, I though he was surrounded by hooded KKK members.

    Am I still normal?

    Meanwhile in SuperCaliLand, “murals” (really, “floorals” because it’s just cheap road signalling paint spelling BLM painted on asphalt) feel the brunt of Whitey Hate:

    California couple charged with HATE CRIME for painting over city-approved BLM mural

    Should floorals now be called “Asphalt POCs” to highlight the immense suffering? I vote for that!

    • Replies: @Known Fact
  31. @pseudo

    “Sometimes, all you can do is laugh”. Like it or not, this is one of the subjects where that advice is true.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
  32. anonymous[177] • Disclaimer says:

    James LaFond is way ahead of you here, Steve.

  33. … criminal firing a Hi-Point held sideways, the Homie.

    It’s tragic, the amount of ammo they waste. A fast kill by aiming is better than a fast shoot by gangsta-grip.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
  34. Gordo says:

    Clearly blm thinks black murder is normal

    Blacks Like Murder

    • Agree: Trinity
    • LOL: wren
  35. Rob McX says:

    Blacks and guns are a combination with great comic potential, e.g. this.

    • Replies: @SunBakedSuburb
  36. @Yojimbo/Zatoichi

    At least the figurine is properly masked, to help keep us all safe in these challenging times

  37. De Blasio keeps saying that the cool $1 billion lifted from the NYPD will be best spent on “youth programs” — so how about marksmanship? Advanced pupils can go on field trips to shoot at Metro-North trains and the elevated subway lines

  38. @El Dato

    KKK I swear was my first thought too — some black chick is going to see those things through the window and call in a hate crime report

  39. Hans says:

    I thought the post was hilarious, but you’ve topped it! LMAO! Thanks pseudo commentator.

  40. @Tono Bungay

    I’m sure that if the media had videos of a handful of the most mundane black-on-black beatings or shootings and played them over and over, the general populace would be talking like George Wallace in no time.

    Nothing should be easier than to make blacks a despised minority than for the media to accurately represent the facts about black crime and general dysfunction, along with prominently featuring the kind of videos that you can find on the internet. Shouldn’t “young black man socks 91-year-old women in the head” be as shocking to white people as the death of George Floyd? (When I refer to white people I’m referring to those in thrall to the dominant culture, not those of us here.)

    I’m afraid it wouldn’t. Whites have been brainwashed for generations to feel shame and rage at any incident in which blacks are victimized by whites, even if the “victimization” consists of some microaggression, rudeness, misunderstanding, etc. The flap over the Central Park bird watcher is illustrative. How does a nothing story like this become international news? It does because the need to keep a lid on anti-black feelings is considered to be so important that anti-white feelings must be constantly stirred up to counteract them. Just as the system in the Old South was intended to keep blacks “in their place,” the system today intends to keep whites in the one assigned to them.

    A well-programmed white person will express their rage at Karens and Beckys, but if you forced them to read about the Knoxville Horror or the Wichita Massacre they would not have the same reaction. Any anti-black feelings that arose in them would make them feel guilty, and then angry at whoever exposed them to the information.

    • Replies: @Jane Plain
  41. FozzieT says:

    Team Chicago just made a decisive move in the battle for this year’s Homie!

    • Replies: @Known Fact
  42. @Pontius

    I could never figure out whether Louis was saying, “WTF?” or “Gimme yo wallet” in this pic. Can you help me?

    • Replies: @anon
  43. @Harry Baldwin

    With respect, I disagree. Sure, white leftists & sad sack normies respond with confusion and rejection. I’ve encountered that.

    But the majority of whites are seething, and with the right leadership they would be whipped into a frenzy by the truth. So it must be suppressed. Because if the truth came out, it would all burn down.

    Do you want that? Where would you get your prescriptions? If you don’t take them, does granny? Your wife?

    I’m not trolling you. I’m asking some honest questions.

  44. @Reg Cæsar

    A recent pic from Mogadishu North, aka the Twin Cities?

    • Replies: @Reg Cæsar
  45. @Rob McX

    “Blacks and guns … comic potential”

    A black comedy. The best kind of comedy.

  46. @FozzieT

    NYC disbands its Anti-Crime Unit but Chicago tops that with disdainful ease. De Blasio can’t even win a race to the bottom!

  47. @Mr McKenna

    Works for the NHL Draft Lottery.

  48. anon[166] • Disclaimer says:
    @Jane Plain

    Can you help me?

  49. AKAHorace says:

    Unrelated but of interested, Cracked (used to be a humour site) denounces Harpers letter asking for open debate:

  50. @anon

    Not that out of the realm of possibility. Decades ago I recall seeing a pistol (foreign, possibly Israeli) which had side mounted sights and a “T” shaped hand grip floating above slide. You would grasp the pistol sideways with one hand and with the other the “T” grip would be grasped, where the piece that held the grip to the pistol frame would go between the fingers.

    The claimed advantage was that it was more controllable. BATF would probably claim it was “any other weapon” and tax it. They did that with the Thompson .45ACP pistol (Tommy gun) twin grip and why you didn’t see vertical fore grips for the Tec-9.

  51. @SunBakedSuburb

    A recent pic from Mogadishu North, aka the Twin Cities?

    I’m sure the Somali refugees were gobsmacked to see their new neighbors acting like the folks back home.

    The difference in the West is that the various clans are color-coded.

  52. Laine says:

    Why the emphasis in this Ted talk on blacks as victims instead of victimizers? 93% of black deaths are at the hands of black killers and number from 4000 to 6000 a year. Why are black lives supposed to matter more to whites than to blacks themselves who don’t bestir themselves over the carnage? Are whites their keeper? Why is white guilt supposed to be greater than black guilt over black on black murder?

    Instead of a mother asking only whites how her child’s body is treated by presumably multi-racial police and clean up crews, where is her bewailing of the 93% likely black killer and the culture that bred him? If a single mother, she may be part of the problem herself, a wicked circle of school dropouts often on Welfare having sons without a father in the home who join gangs to commit crimes while daughters repeat their mother’s teen pregnancy mistakes.

    Where is the admission that blacks are killing their own children with abortion and guns at a disproportionate rate to other races? Where are the black attempts to change this at the root of the problem instead of the constant deflection of blame onto whites? Where are the marches led by black ministers calling for a return to morality and intact families? Where are the protests against inferior schools in black areas provided by teachers’ unions who are the biggest financial supporters of the Democrat Party? Yet like teachers blacks vote massively, over 90% for Democrats who have for decades run the cities that blacks complain are racist with violent police.

    People who demonstrate in the millions for felons harmed while resisting arrest don’t fill a phone booth to protest their children being killed in drive by shootings etc. Defunding police will result in the latter deaths increasing. If blacks refuse to respect black life except as a means to pump up rage against whitey, why are whites supposed to show superior care? In fact they already do, with much lower homicide rates against any race including blacks. In that way whites are already more respectful of life but they’re supposed to achieve perfection while nothing is expected of blacks themselves who are doing the killing or condoning it with their silence? What sense does that make?

    • Replies: @Harry Baldwin
    , @Olorin
  53. D.I.e_y.t says:

    Lori ‘groot’ Lightfoot will take the top honor Homie of the Year, hands down no fricken contest bruh. Chicago is collapsing freefall in the deafening silence. No joke

  54. @Laine

    People who demonstrate in the millions for felons harmed while resisting arrest don’t fill a phone booth to protest their children being killed in drive by shootings

    In fairness, there are regular “Stop the Violence” marches in black communities. Regrettably, they are often occasions for more shooting.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
  55. MBlanc46 says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    Fair cop. I’ll unperson myself.

  56. Anonymous[387] • Disclaimer says:
    @Redneck farmer

    “Sometimes, all you can do is laugh”.

    And shake your head. Don’t forget that bit.

  57. Anonymous[387] • Disclaimer says:
    @The Alarmist

    It’s tragic, the amount of ammo they waste.

    I wonder. Perhaps it isn’t actually being wasted?

    What I mean is: blacks kill each other, there is no doubt about that. But how many of these shootings have more to do with status and display than actual killing?

    There was an account of a shooting someone posted on iSteve recently where the two parties involved were shooting at each other, all right, but they were shooting at each with their arm extended behind them as they were running in the opposite direction.

    Perhaps that kind of shooting is a one-off, but it did get me thinking about my own (thankfully brief) gang experience. Sure, a gang of any size is likely to have a hothead or two who really is interested in hurting/killing other people, but in large part, being in a gang is about looking tough (status and display) more than anything else.

    So I wonder if all this putatively wasted ammunition does actually serve a purpose. Namely, allowing these would-be warriors a chance to show how tough they are by “busting caps,” making a lot of noise, and showing those around them that they are worthy of being taken seriously.

    Actually training with firearms and becoming proficient in their use would raise the stakes of this children’s game. Blacks don’t want that.

  58. Olorin says:

    Why are black lives supposed to matter more to whites than to blacks themselves who don’t bestir themselves over the carnage? Are whites their keeper? Why is white guilt supposed to be greater than black guilt over black on black murder?

    Yes, black lives are supposed to matter more to whites than to blacks.

    Yes, whites are supposed to be blacks’ keepers.

    White guilt is supposed to be greater because blacks are unaffected by guilt by and large.

    This–THIS!–is the Continental Divide where the rains of racial realism fall either on the black or white side of the continent.

    The biggest racial realists in our society are the liberals/leftists who come out and endlessly wail that most blacks cannot help themselves. That most blacks need external help. That most blacks lack the moral and emotional grounding that makes murder a bad thing. That most blacks cannot reflect on these things, nor be expected to.

    That is what is behind every bit of leftist/bolsh propaganda on black/white relations.

    That is what they are observing and saying.

    But we’re not allowed to point out that that, at bottom, is what they are realizing/saying. So we have to do these mazurkas where whites accept endless scapegoating/blame for black misbehavior. Where whites are literally held responsible for it despite not having done it…and even tried everything in our power to modify or improve it, failing continually.

    And so, since this is realized, blacks are recognized to be too undeveloped for blame. But someone must be blamed. Scapegoated. Taxed.

    And soon brought into the slavery of endless reparations to individuals who, once the golden goose is slain will slough back into the savagery of their genetics.

    Remember: blacks themselves tell us these things–all the time. I’ll point the Sailertariat to a classic piece from Those Who Can See blog in 2013:

    We Are Wild Animals: Treat Us As Such

    They tell us this. We should begin to believe them.

  59. Anonymous[387] • Disclaimer says:
    @Harry Baldwin

    In fairness, there are regular “Stop the Violence” marches in black communities.

    I’ve seen videos of those demonstrations on and off over the last few years. I could be in the minority, but frankly, I have a difficult time believing the people who stage them take what they are doing seriously.

    It seems to me that if blacks were serious about ending black violence (I refuse to use the phrase “gun violence,” as guns themselves have no history of violence whatever), they could do what the Amish do: socially ostracise members of the community who break the rules.

    I can guarantee you that Danequon is going to clean up his act in a hurry if the black community takes a stand and decides amongst themselves that they are no longer to talk to him, sell to him, and, the worst sanction of all (NB ladies!), put out for him.

    In fact, Spike Lee actually filmed a version of Lysistrata a few years ago called Chi-Raq. While Lysistrata is a comedy, I refuse to believe that no one from the black community is capable of grasping the basic principle involved and coming up with their own set of social sanctions for those members of the black community who will not behave.

    None of this is to say that “stop the violence” marches do not fulfil a purpose: they do. Two purposes, in fact. The first (relatively minor) purpose is to convince members of the black community that they are “doing something” about the endemic violence by walking around (exercise, of course, being anathema) with bits of cardboard on sticks.

    The second, much more important, purpose of these demonstrations is to browbeat white people into giving black people money to solve problems that black people themselves have created. After all, everyone knows that all of the problems black people have are due to either 1) white people “keeping them down” through some mysterious, never-explained process or 2) white people not “supporting” black people adequately (which is another way of saying that, somehow, whites owe it to blacks to hand them enormous sums of cash for them to spunk up the wall).

    If there has ever been a reason to take black anti-violence marches seriously, I have yet to discern it. As far as I can tell, blacks are rarely, if ever, serious about solving their own problems. Why should they be when there are so many well-off, gullible white people who seem to think they owe it to blacks to sort out their problems for them?

  60. Lagertha says:

    if Trump loses, there will never be Oscars/Grammy’s/Emmy’s again! Or ones when winners will
    exit to a vomitorium.

    I have always struggled with stupid people to explain my political views…but, if Trump loses, there is no more wealth class to support the Arts – or what is called that. Without rich people, there is no production job for you, – you, lowly bottom job of movies.

    It’s all over..In some ways, taxing the billionaires at 90% (as is in the Nordic Countries) may pivot social programs a bit. But, those rich assholes will move to NZ, Iceland…tax havens…and they will still figure out ways to pay you minimum wage.

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