*Video highlights, lowlights, and suck-uplights at Hot Air.*
She’s baaaaaaack. On the front page of the NYTimes. On The View at 11:00am Eastern with Barbara Walter’s gabbling gals.
But don’t you dare breathe a negative word about anything she says, you hear?
You racists! You mean, wife-beating conservative Thuglicans!
Not that we need to watch The View to predict the softball questions they’ll ask. Here, I will save you the time:
Whoopi (furrowed brow, concerned tone): How do you deal with all the negativity?
Michelle: It’s hard. It’s hard. But I’m so proud. Proud of how I–we, Barack and I, and our children–have handled the stress. We’ve made sacrifices. But this is not about me–us. This is about the souls of America. I am a patriot. I love this country.
Joy: But how do you balance the work and the family? How do you balance it all?
Michelle: It’s hard. It’s hard. But I’m so proud of how we’ve managed to balance and sacrifice. Sacrifice.
Entire View table: Mmmmm.
Sherri: Ok. Tough question now: Where did you get those pearls?
Ok. I’m tuning in. She’s just done the fist bump with all the yammerers. Walters is reading from the NYTimes and asking about the attacks on her.
So I got the questioner wrong, but I got the question right. And the answer: Michelle says she is patriotic and that she takes the attacks in stride:
“I am proud of my country, without a doubt.”
Walters perpetuates the Michelle Obama-as-GOP victim meme. Of course.
Blah-blah. Diversity pabulum. Obama: “People aren’t used to strong women.”
Who is she talking about?
Whoopi is so excited she knocked her coffee mug over and spilled on herself.
At least she’s not ogling or weeping yet.
11:17am. Back from a break. Did I call it again or what?
Sherri gushes over Michelle’s sleeveless dress and toned arms. Sherri: “You look gorgeous!”
Michelle: “It’s fun to look pretty!”
Whoopi claims TV only shows ugly black woman and she thanks Michelle for being a pretty black woman.
I’m not kidding.
Walters grills Michelle about…pantyhose.
Michelle’s against pantyhose.
Whoopi slavers over Barack’s Father’s Day speech.
Walters: Did you want Barack to be president?
No. “Politics is mean…Obama was sweet, “empathetic.”
Sherri: “Did you say pathetic?” Tittering.
Yeah, I was tittering, too.
Ding. I called it again: Michelle talking about her “sacrifices.”
Barack doesn’t take out the garbage anymore.
Back after a break. Matthew Broderick comes on. His son is an Obama fan. “He really follows the election and he really takes to your husband.”
Michelle: “You know, kids are drawn to Barack. I think it’s because his name is easy to say.”
I can’t really take much more of this.
11:45am Eastern. Discussion is about Las Vegas. Michelle Obama’s mom has won $17,000 playing slots.
God damn America!