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Constructive Solution for Puerto Rico (Short of Cutting It Loose)
Make It A Refugee Dump!

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Last week, a Puerto Rican with mental problems shot up the Baggage Claim area at Fort Lauderdale airport, killing five people and wounding eight others.

You know Puerto Rico. That’s our big colony in the Caribbean, although of course we’re not supposed to call it a colony.

I’ve been grumbling about Puerto Rico for ever, I know. Why are we responsible for the stinking place? It’s a millstone round our necks.

The general level of human capital there is very low. Forty years ago, when I first made friends with a long-serving member of the New York Police Department, I expected all his most lurid cop stories would be about the local underclass blacks. There were indeed some of those. His most hair-raising anecdotes, though, were about Puerto Ricans. And those were the Puerto Ricans with enough get-up-and-go to take a plane to Los Estados Unidos. The ones back on the island are just as bad, only less energetic.’s James Kirkpatrick and Allan Wall have both called (in Allan’s case repeatedly) for Puerto Rico to become independent— “cut it loose,” as James Kirkpatrick puts it.

But don’t accuse me of crass negativity. I’ve actually made constructive, positively moderate, suggestions:

If I were running the CIA … I’d stage a Castro-style coup in Puerto Rico and install a fiercely anti-American dictator, to give us the excuse to sever ties and blockade the place for fifty years. Nobody in Washington has any imagination any more, that’s the problem.

Yeah, that’s the problem all right.

And Puerto Rico’s in the news not just for exporting homicidal lunatics:

Puerto Rico’s new governor was sworn in Monday, promising an immediate push for statehood in a territory facing a deep economic crisis …

The crowd rose to its feet and cheered as Rossello announced that he would fly to Washington, D.C., Monday to back a bill to admit Puerto Rico as the 51st state.

Puerto Rico’s New Gov Promises Immediate Push For Statehood, By Danica Coto, Associated Press, January 2, 2017

Lots of luck with that, Gov. I confidently predict that any political party in control of the U.S. government that granted statehood to Puerto Rico would never be elected to anything ever again.

Steve Sailer actually came up with another, different constructive suggestion the other day. He began by noticing that in the seven years from 2009 to 2015, Puerto Rico took in just ten (10) refugees, an average of 1.4 refugees per year. Now, it’s true that Puerto Rico has only a small population—just about exactly one one-hundredth of the U.S.A.’s. Which means that 1.4 per year would be an equivalent, for the U.S.A., of 140 per year.

The actual number the Obama administration proposes to take in during fiscal 2017 is 110,000—up from the 85,000 we took in last year.

So the island paradise is really not pulling its weight refugee-wise. Why not?

It’s not that the place is overcrowded. Population density is a tad over one thousand people per square mile—that’s less dense than New Jersey.

Hence Steve’s suggestion: Turn Puerto Rico into a refugee sanctuary. Why, after all, are we sending Somalis to the frozen wastes of Minnesota? Somalia’s actually on the equator, for crying out loud. Somalis would be much happier in Puerto Rico’s climate.

I have an alternative suggestion. The European countries have a terrible problem with illegal aliens, most of whom are unemployable. Germany alone took in 1.2 million in 2014-2015, of whom less than two percent have so far found work. [Just 34,000 migrants out of 1.2million to arrive in Germany in the last two years have found work, government reveals, By Allan Hall, and Jennifer Newton, Daily Mail, December 19, 2016] Italy last year took in 181,000. I don’t have employment figures, but I doubt they’re any better than Germany’s.

The illegals claim asylum in Europe, but not many of their claims stand up to scrutiny. There’s no way to get rid of them, though. They ditch their passports and identity papers before landing in Europe, so you mostly can’t tell where they come from. Even when you can tell, the sending countries don’t want them back, so you can’t repatriate them. They just wander loose around Europe, like the Berlin truck killer. [Berlin truck attacker Anis Amri used 14 identities, had criminal record – police,, January 7, 2017]

What the Europeans need is some remote island where they could ship these illegals to holding pens. Australia did this successfully, using small Pacific islands for the pens. [Aussie immigration architect: Europe ‘just making up excuses’, By Zoya Sheftalovich, Politico, January 7, 2017]

But Europe seems not to have any islands to spare. So let’s lease them space on Puerto Rico. If it’s our island, under our sovereignty, we may as well do something useful with it.

There’d be jobs for Puerto Ricans, as guards, cooks and so on in the pens. We’d get revenue from the leases. Europe would be rid of a problem. What’s not to like?

The food and accommodation in the pens could be of a low quality. That would be a feature, not a bug. After a few years of sleeping on boards and eating yam stew, the illegals would be begging for repatriation.

Like I said, there’s no negativity here at We’re bursting with constructive solutions to the world’s problems—bursting!

John Derbyshire [email him] writes an incredible amount on all sorts of subjectsfor all kinds of outlets. (This no longer includes National Review, whose editors had some kind of tantrum and fired him. ) He is the author of We Are Doomed: Reclaiming Conservative Pessimism and several other books. He’s had two books published by FROM THE DISSIDENT RIGHT (also available in Kindle) and From the Dissident Right II: Essays 2013. His writings are archived

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• Category: Ideology • Tags: Immigration, Puerto Rico, VDare Archives 

27 Comments to "Constructive Solution for Puerto Rico (Short of Cutting It Loose)"

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  1. says:
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    I beg to differ. The European governments COULD stop illegal immigration. They COULD stop this “asylum” nonsense. They COULD send them back, or better yet, simply not let them in, in the first place. They simply lack the POLITICAL will and courage to do so.

    As for Puero Rico, I cannot see what America has ever gained from having the place. America didn’t even manage to make it an English speaking place. At least they managed that much in Hawaii. If P.R. ever becomes a state, the Spanish language will have its “IN” that it has been looking for, for a long time. Just wait Americans, until you get language in politics like here in Canada!

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  2. Ingenius, Derb, but no, just cut Puerto Rico loose, and revoke their passports. That would prevent further US politicians from wasting many more billions on the place and the dubious individuals inhabiting it.

  3. After a few years of sleeping on boards and eating yam stew mofongo, the illegals would be begging for repatriation.

    It’s worse.

  4. I think the role of Boricuas in nearly destroying NYC in the 1970s is underrated and under-examined. It was their arrival en masse in the 1950s that turned formerly decent nabes into war zones. They were the reason so many taxpayers left. Blacks had been in NYC a lot longer and the city proved it could digest them. Blacks and Puerto Ricans, no way. Coincidentally, NYC murder stats started to improve in the mid-90s right after Puerto Ricans began to move out.

    Today, Puerto Ricans are working their same magic in Springfield Mass. And the papers and websites there just report on the shootings and armed robberies as if reporting on a rainstorm. No one connects the dots or wonders why a formerly peaceful area is now a horrible dump.

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  5. I have known exactly one Puerto Rican in my lifetime. He was in my Air Force Basic Training Flight, he lasted a less week before they sent him home. Turns out he showed up to Basic as a walking petri dish for several different kinds of STDs.

  6. Oh come now. The UK has a fine island in the South Atlantic, South Georgia, and it was once home to hardy Norwegian whalers and we know how desirable Norway is to third world migrants. It has abundant fresh glacial water, seals and penguins and the aforementioned whales.

  7. I confidently predict that any political party in control of the U.S. government that granted statehood to Puerto Rico would never be elected to anything ever again.

    Well, the Democrats have threatened to do this time and again, and I confidently believe it was on the agenda for Hillary’s first, lost, (un)lamented term.

    And they’d be doing it to help ensure their continued election, time and again. Not to mention two more Democrat senators in Congress, forever after. What’s not to like, from their point of view? Another few million votes for Democrat presidential candidates, guaranteed electoral votes as well, and of course a few million more dependents on the rolls, though truth to tell most of them are already there.

    The Dems always say to make it fair we’d put it to a vote among Puerto Ricans, as though theirs is the only voice that matters. Why not put it to a vote among Americans? Even that is risky, though, because of the inevitable MSM onslaught in favor. I say boot them out–they’ve proven themselves unworthy–and boot out their kinsmen on the mainland as well.

    The admission of a whole new state full of democrat dependents (sorry for the redundancy) is the very last thing America needs. But yeah, at the least we could and should move our ‘refugee’ problem offshore.

  8. Britain has no need for Puerto Rico. We could use North Rona, St Kilda, and Rockall. Then South Georgia.

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  9. I would suggest Viques Island. In the middle of the old bombing Range. Tell the inmates they are welcome to leave.Set a wide strip of land mines, but don’t tell them about that. But, be sure to tell them about the unexploded ordinance all around them.

  10. There are also are spare islands they could send them too. I hear Svalbard is particularly miserable this time of year!

  11. Derb is way overthinking this.

    I’ve noted for some time, PR is in pre-foreclosure. When it defaults, POTUS TRUMP should sweep in and pull a Thomas Jefferson by purchasing PR outright.

    For North America to thrive again, Job One is to find a cost-effective and morally palatable way to permanently remove all people who simply cannot or will not play by the rules already in place.

    Let’s face it, a ferociously feral human at 15 or 16 (any race, any creed, any culture) isn’t likely to become a net contributor to our society. It’s probably beyond the pale to simply exterminate people convicted of serious common-law crimes, and paying to house, feed and clothe them for decades (if not the rest of their lives) is tantamount to punishing good citizens TWICE.

    I say, PR for penal colony. Anyone who commits a violent crime gets sent there. Permanently. Ditto any uninvited immigrant who, once deported, shows back up. All persons going there are sterilized (because “save the children” always short-circuits common sense among most people) and once they’re dropped off, they’re forgotten. The climate is good, no one dies of frostbite or exposure, and food grows on trees year round.

    Family members who strenuously object are welcome to join those exiled.

    Escape From New York
    , only no Snake Plisken.

    Failing this wonderfully simple strategy, I favor Nationwide Concealed Carry. True violations of the social contract (via commission of violent crimes) require Darwinian selection.

  12. So when I watched “Chico and the man” as a kid, I was watching pure propaganda? Damn, who knew?

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  13. says:
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    If that nut hadn’t gone on the shooting spree, he would be a regular among the SJW crowd.

    His ilk would hardly stand out in many universities or hipster-dipster neighborhoods.

  14. The Puertes were given citizen rights by the second worst president, Wilson, so they would sign up for his war in Europe .

  15. says:
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    In New York City you would be able to jump the public housing line if you were displaced and made homeless by fire, so Puerto Ricans set fire to their own buildings to get into subsidized public housing and pay less in rent.

  16. says:
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    So when I watched “Chico and the man” as a kid, I was watching pure propaganda? Damn, who knew?

    Yeah, we didn’t know better and thought nothing weird about a Chicano being played by a Hungarian Jew with the name Frederick Pruentzel.

  17. Totally agree. In fact, I agree and will amplify: let’s discard any significantly populated unincorporated territories acquired during our EEEVILLL imperialist period, including the USVI, Guam, and American Samoa. We can keep Wake and Midway Islands; they have some military strategic value.

    After all, these places must be living under some sort of unmitigated hell of white racism, right? Its the only moral thing to do. And if you don’t agree, you are literally Hitler.

  18. What happened here? Did Derb complete his allotted amount of Muslim bashing and Negro bashing and now is turning his loving attention to Puerto Ricans?

    Or is it that the fact that the patsy in the latest false flag/hoax was a Puerto Rican was a signal to shift over to crapping on those people?

    Spreading the love…

  19. Kick ass idea. The PR would be demanding to be cut loose in a year two tops.

  20. One of the best examples I have ever seen of complete and utter ignorance on a topic.

  21. I think the simplest and noblest method of of decolonization is for us to apologize to Spain for that unfortunate misunderstanding regarding the battleship Maine and respectfully return Puerto Rico to the Kingdom of Spain. A diplomatic coup and everybody wins.

  22. Springfield Mass., my hometown was a wonderful place to grow up in the 1950s -60s. Safe walks to school, a bustling downtown, known as City of Homes for its great housing stock. We were driven out in the early 80s by forced busing. Visited several years ago and was so depressed I will never go back. “Diversity is our strength”, spit.

  23. I always enjoy your depraved comedy routines.

  24. The livable space on Rockall is 1 m²….

    And even then you need to secure your tent with pylons and ropes lest it be blown away.

  25. There is no constructive solution short of cutting Puerto Rico off. The only constructive solution is to cut Puerto Rico off from the United States and force its independence.

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Limbaugh and company certainly entertain. But a steady diet of ideological comfort food is no substitute for hearty intellectual fare.
Once as a colonial project, now as a moral playground, the ancient continent remains the object of Great Power maneuvering