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From the Babylon Bee:

Trudeau Claims He Was Known As ‘Corn Pop’ Until A Cool White Dude Turned His Life Around
September 21st, 2019

THE GREAT WHITE NORTH— …According to childhood friend “Smokey,” Trudeau used to be known as “Corn Pop,” and was a “bad dude” who ran around with “a bunch of bad boys.”

One day, Corn Pop and Smokey were hanging at the community pool/hockey rink when a white lifeguard named Joey B scolded Corn Pop for not following the rules. The incident escalated to the point where Corn Pop and the gang waited outside by Joey’s moose with razors, ready to “cut that cracker down.” Joey B came out with a sharpened icicle, ready for action, but instead of an altercation, something happened: Joey apologized for making a derogatory comment about Corn Pop’s ethnic hair.

I am returning to my home planet. My work here is complete because you earthlings can now carry on.

 
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  1. Does this mean you’re not getting the fancy laptop?

    • Replies: @Steve Sailer
  2. Hail says: • Website

    Many of Trudeau’s supporters hope this new information will shed light on the transformation this progressive leader has gone through, and give hope to others that if an African-Canadian gangster from the projects can become a popular, white, liberal prime minister, then maybe there’s hope for the rest of us.

    Trudeau-Dolezal 2020.
    The Time Has Come.

    • LOL: IHTG
    • Replies: @Autochthon
    , @Lagertha
  3. Anonymous[289] • Disclaimer says:

    Where was Aunt Esther Williams?

    • Replies: @njguy73
  4. Well, unlike most crap from Canada, it is pretty hard to figure out. Gotta give him that.

    • Agree: Charon
  5. newrouter says:

    I think there was a bimbx involved somehow in this altercation.

  6. SafeNow says:

    “white lifeguard”

    Redundant.

    • LOL: Realist
  7. AKAHorace says:

    Well at least he didn’t blacken up on an official state visit. I mean it could have been worse.

  8. I am returning to my home planet.

    My work here is complete because you earthlings can now carry on.

    Is Planet Hollywood moving to Sherman Oaks, Uncle K-Pax ?

  9. Anonymous[427] • Disclaimer says:

    Teach, your children well:

  10. The irony is that that story probably moved a lot of lefty Boomers and Greatest Generation types to tears for years and got them believing in Creepy Joe. But now…..people are challenging the tale, and it’s not passing the smell test.

    Like the black girls claiming whites are always asking to touch their hair, this just doesn’t seem realistic when you think about it for ten seconds.

    Sadly, this shows that people who vote don’t think about things for ten seconds.

    Karl Rove was right. You attack a politician on his perceived strengths, not his weaknesses. That’s because whatever a politician promotes as his strengths: (1) aren’t that strong; and (2) haven’t actually been fact checked because people just believe them. Going after Kerry’s Vietnam record was devastatingly good for W., because it turns out there’s a lot of vets who didn’t like Kerry and didn’t think he was all that heroic and his story had holes in it. For years Kerry had dined out on that, both as a young activist and then as a senator. Then, when challenged, while it didn’t fall apart, it certainly had a lot of blemishes that hurt him.

  11. njguy73 says:
    @Anonymous

    Where was Aunt Esther Williams?

    I was sticking her face in dough and making gorilla cookies.

  12. J.Ross says:

    Was “corn pop” a widely known grocery product in the past? Is this supposed to be invoking “Jiffy Pop”? Was That Puerto Rican Guy not available?
    —–
    A few recent items from NPR:
    There is a disturbing trend of erasure and rewriting of history. An NPR storytelling platform gave some segment time to the 1865 podcast, which is nominally a dramatization of the period following the assassination of Lincoln leading into the impeachment of Johnson. In an emotional private monolog delivered by a cabinet member to Lincoln’s body, it is clear that they are fantasizing about Obama, and later we learn that the Civil War was fought to end bigotry, which raises questions about Johnson because his chief attribute is apparently “bigot.” This is like Craig Mazin imagining a Soviet Union where cat ladies could tell off Party-member administrators.
    NPR recently reminded us that the echo chamber is not internet forums where you can be disagreed with. A phone call from Pete B., who pursues an alternate lifestyle and will never be president, brings up a Democratic Party drinking society where a significant number of the members (to include leadership) were open Trump supporters. The abandonment of the white working class, the accelerated deportation of manufacturing, Vladimir Putin tricking Hillary into not campaigning in the midwest, and Black Lives Matter’s assassination campaign against cops are not mentioned. Instead the piece is a curious look into how little these people have intellectually moved since 2016. In fact the piece is mainly about the journalist’s personal hurt that such a thing could be allowed to happen. All his phrasing is always broadly from the starting point. The closest he gets to an objective sentence asks about winning the ttaitors back, and that line is followed by “what’s going to happen to them?” y’know, as in, should such perfidy go unpunished? When he finally gets around to talking to them they sound pretty cash. Unapologetic, permitting the interview but then frustrating it with Midwestern conciseness, never giving any reasons (to a scumbag journalist who isn’t really interested in a discussion).
    Oh and BBC radio’s weekly panel discussed the unprecedented evil horror that is Russian interference in Africa. Nobody familiar with US foreign policy in South America will be especially persuaded by Chatham House’s pearl-clutching here. Even the obvious telegraphed low-information listener’s takeaway, that Russia supports dictatorship, is pretty much “US policy but not as extensive.”

  13. I am returning to my home planet. My work here is complete because you earthlings can now carry on.

    Not so quick. You live in Hotel California. You can check out, but you can never leave.

    Besides, all the Babylon Bee item proves is that they read iSteve and can borrow your riffs. They have yet to prove that they can coin memorable phrases or discuss baseball stats at length. Bad Finger did not replace the Beatles.

    • Replies: @Simon Tugmutton
  14. Lagertha says:

    Trudeau and Corn Pop….my mind is rambling: Corn-poked, corned, corn rows, corny, corn mazes, shucked corn, corn-on-the-cob, corned beef hash (yuck, btw, for me), corn cob pipes, candy corn….I don’t even, like corn!

    • Replies: @ganderson
  15. Lagertha says:
    @Hail

    hahhahaaaaaa – so corned-out crazy corn, funny!

  16. Comments are backed up again (is Sailer out golfing or something?) so this may have already been posted, but it’s fun stuff about yet another racist NYT writer who’s obsessed with–wait for it–her hair! She’s like a black Sarah Jeong, which means her future at the NYT is bright indeed.

    Hi, my name is Jazmine Hughes, and my self-care regimen is 🚨🚨ignoring white nonsense🚨🚨

    — Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) March 25, 2015

    Dating white people is a rich tapestry of somehow making fun of them for everything they do. Wouldn’t trade it for the world

    — Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) June 14, 2015

    no new white friends 2k15

    — Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) June 22, 2015

    Every time Viola Davis stunts with her natural hair on TV is one fewer time I have to explain gravity and curls to a dumb white person SOOOO

    — Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) September 21, 2015

    “racialized humor is an instrument that people of color can use to placate themselves in the face of the overwhelming reality: It’s just better to be Caucasian.”

    Read her stuff! She often comes close to using words at random, which I find is typical for negroes. Oh sorry, I’m just pushing back at the stereotype that they supposedly have some facility with language because they can figure out how to rhyme now and then. If this girl was white she’d be working the counter at the Tastee-Freez. But at least she’d be working.

    Her most recent project for the Times’ magazine was the 1619 Project, a comprehensive series of articles and essays arguing that slavery was the institution that fundamentally shaped the modern United States.

    The newspaper made a massive investment in the 1619 Project, through which it aimed to redefine America’s understanding of the history of slavery. Hughes was no small part of the newspaper’s work on this, as she was on the byline of one of two major feature pieces on the broadsheet print edition of the special.

    “The broadsheet special section has two components: A reported essay by Nikita Stewart, a reporter on The Times’s Metro desk, examining why Americans are so poorly educated on slavery, followed by a history of slavery written by Mary Elliott, curator of American slavery at the Smithsonian’s National Museum of African American History and Culture, and Jazmine Hughes, a writer and editor at The Times Magazine,” the Times wrote about how its 1619 Project feature came together, highlighting the critical role that Hughes played in its publication.

    https://www.breitbart.com/the-media/2019/09/22/another-new-york-times-editor-made-racist-anti-semitic-comments/

    Of course, Brietbart being Breitbart, their main concern is that she said Jews are good with money. BTW, if you Google Sarah Jeong, all of the top results are about how she and the NYT “shut down a major bullying tactic of the alt-right.”

    • Replies: @Reg Cæsar
  17. sayless says:

    How could The Times hire a writer who thinks that “placate” means “soothe” ?

    Why did they fire all of the copy editors? They need them more than ever.

    But, they were allowing Snuck instead of Sneaked twenty years ago, so damn their eyes.

    • Agree: MBlanc46
    • Replies: @Dissident
  18. Hail says: • Website
    @J.Ross

    Was “corn pop” a widely known grocery product in the past? Is this supposed to be invoking “Jiffy Pop”?

    The following is for posterity, as there is no way people reading this in the future will readily ‘get’ what is being directly parodied by the Babylon Bee here:

    _____________

    Corn Pop was a bad dude, and he ran a bunch of bad boys.”

    — Joseph R. Biden, Jr., June 26, 2017; clip found by right-wing media in September 2019 and began circulating about the same time as the Justin Trudeau “blackface” scandal. Biden was relating an experience he had as “the only white lifeguard” at a Wilmington, Delaware, swimming pool in the summer 0f 1962. A local black tough known as “Corn Pop” had a confrontation with Biden, then age 19.

    The rest of the Biden anecdote, verbatim, transcribed:

    He [Corn Pop] said “I’ll be waiting for you!”

    He was waiting there with three guys with straight-razors. Not a joke!

    There was a guy named Bill Wrightmaus [?], the only White guy, and he did all the pools. He was the mechanic. I said, “What am I gonna do?” and he said “Come down here in the basement.” There used to be a chain that went across the deep end. He cut off a six-foot length of chain, and he said, “You walk out with that chain, and you walk out to the car and say, ‘You may cut me, man, but I’m gonna wrap this chain around your head.’” I said, “Your’re kidding me.” He said, “No, and if you don’t, don’t come back!” And he was right.

    So I walked out with the chain…and I looked at him. But I was smart, then, and I said “When I tell you to get off the board, you get off the board, and I’ll kick you out again, but I shouldn’t have called you Esther Williams. I apologize for that.”

    I didn’t know that apology was gonna work. He said, “You apologized to me?” I said, “I apologize, not for throwing you out, but I apologize for what I said.” He said, “Okay,” closed the straight razor, and my heart began to beat again.

    • Replies: @Hail
  19. anonymous[194] • Disclaimer says:

    Why am I supposed to be laughing at Joe Biden’s anecdote? Is it because it’s implausible or is it because some of the details are painfully out of date? If I’m supposed to be laughing for the latter reason then fine.

    I find it believable that in the early 60’s there was a black thug who went by the street name Corn Pop. His gang was named The Romans. Check. He carried a rusty straight razor as a weapon. Check. He was at a swimming pool and his masculinity was insulted when the lifeguard called him Esther Williams. Check. It was the early 60’s .

    If Biden had told a story about dancing the Twist at a sock-hop hosted by an up and coming DJ named Cousin Brucie I’d probably laugh at that too. I wouldn’t be laughing because I didn’t believe him.

    • Agree: Hail
    • Replies: @Danindc
  20. @Mr McKenna

    If this girl was white she’d be working the counter at the Tastee-Freez.

    Serving Jack and Diane? Or telling them to cut it out or take it behind the tree.

    • LOL: Bubba
    • Replies: @Anonymous
    , @Mr McKenna
    , @Bubba
  21. Hail says: • Website
    @Hail

    Corn Pop was a bad dude, and he ran a bunch of bad boys.”

    — Joseph R. Biden, Jr., June 26, 2017; clip found by right-wing media in September 2019

    See also:

    https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Corn_Pop&action=history

    Revision history

    – [current] 01:36, 17 September 2019‎ 67.68.29.177 – 23 bytes 0‎ | I don’t think a guy Biden mentioned at one campaign event is worth a redirect, not mentioned in the article. Not sure if it should be deleted but at the very least I see the Corn Pops article as the better option. | Tag: Redirect target changed to Corn Pops

    – [page created] 00:31, 17 September 2019‎ SamHolt6 -‎ 23 bytes +23 |‎ ←Redirected page to Joe Biden.

  22. Ano says:

    Be brave Justin.
    It’s okay to be 0% white (just ask Elizabeth Warren).
    Come out of the closet as a black man, and dress up as Nelson Mandela.
    Only you can end white rule in Canada.

    God speed Mr Sailer. (I guess that’s your UFO in those declassified videos.)

  23. Anonymous[427] • Disclaimer says:
    @Reg Cæsar

    There is a particular significance to the Tastee-Freez reference. In a small town, you had, if no other chain, a Dairy Queen. If you had a Tastee-Freez in a small town, it was a really, really small town that could not justify a DQ. (Most Tastee-Freezes were in rowhouse urban areas-I remember well on visits to Chicago, we’d go to the one next to the Claude Griesel Mortuary down by St. Francis de Sales. However if they were in a small town, it was either extremely tiny or it was at least the size of, say, Quincy, Illinois so that it could handle both a Tastee-Freez and a DQ.)

    Just an aside.

  24. @Reg Cæsar

    I kinda like how she admits that dating white guys is the absolute best and while we’re at it, declares that “the overwhelming reality” is “It’s just better to be Caucasian.”

    Even granting her tendency to use words at random, I do believe she needs to cancel herself forthwith and report to her nearest re-education camp, because the amount of white supremacy she’s trafficking in is well I can’t even.

  25. Real crackers ate Sugar Pops:

    • Replies: @Charon
    , @ScarletNumber
    , @TWS
  26. Charon says:
    @Reg Cæsar

    The cartoon cowboy lacks a certain je ne sais quoi in comparison with the hot white man brandishing a whip. Just sayin’

    • Replies: @ScarletNumber
  27. anonymous[194] • Disclaimer says:

    When the seventy-six year old man told me he used to go to the drugstore for the cheeseburgers and to peruse something he called a paperback spinner I began to worry. My fears were confirmed when he then mentioned watching a nationally televised SEC football game and claimed all the players were white. The last time I visited him in the home he started on about places of business once being closed on Sundays . At that point I could no longer humor his senile delusions and burst into tear streaked hysterical laughter.

  28. @Laugh Track

    And how strong are they on golf-course design?

    • Replies: @Laugh Track
  29. Clyde says:

    I liked where an icicle was used as a weapon in the Great Frozen North of Trudeau.

  30. @Gary in Gramercy

    I’m procrastinating waiting for Apple to go back to the good keyboards of the past.

  31. Reading this, for a moment, I thought that Uncle Joe might have plagiarised his Corn Pop story from Trudeau, but got his “facts” mixed up.

  32. J.Ross says:
    @Steve Sailer

    >surely Apple hardware will get better
    [Mayan glyph depicting a carb-craving cosmic monster, numbers represented by dots and rods, and Jason Alexander holding a baseball bat]
    Pay a shop to tailor an IBM ThinkPad for you.

  33. Anonymous[160] • Disclaimer says:
    @Steve Sailer

    Since the last Apple product that had an especially good keyboard was the ][+, you might have a long wait.

    • Agree: Kevin O'Keeffe
    • Replies: @MBlanc46
  34. Danindc says:
    @anonymous

    I believe Biden’s story as well. At least 80% of it

  35. Dan Smith says:

    Jazmine is the yappy Pomeranian on a leash that you’re tempted to kick forty yards downfield. Her master is a connected white liberal, so you don’t.

  36. Anonymous[178] • Disclaimer says:
    @Steve Sailer

    Steve is waiting for the first viable quantum laptop, so he could achieve quantum supremacy over us all.
    https://www.sciencenews.org/article/rumors-hint-that-google-has-accomplished-quantum-supremacy

  37. Realist says:

    I am returning to my home planet. My work here is complete because you earthlings can now carry on.

    Don’t leave…we don’t have a prayer.

    • Agree: Charon, Hail
  38. Anonymous[358] • Disclaimer says:
    @Steve Sailer

    I stopped typing reports when I discovered the newest Dragon Naturally Speaking 15 software allows you to dictate upwards of 120 words per minute with 98% accuracy out of the box. I stayed away from it because the VR I had used on Siri or Google would mangle my sentences/words. I thought using VR dictation would only add frustration and time. I was wrong. Now I spend most of my time proofing/editing, which previously was always half-assed after I was tired from typing up a report.

    • Replies: @TWS
  39. @Steve Sailer

    If you want a truly good keyboard you’re best off purchasing a discrete mechanical keyboard, for instance the well-named Das Keyboard: https://www.daskeyboard.com

    There are many other mechanical keyboards available, as they’ve become a hit with PC power users. Here’s one storefront dedicated to it: https://mechanicalkeyboards.com/shop/

    These are fairly comparable to the old IBM keyboards you probably used when you worked in marketing in the 1980s. Those are still available, incidentally, as IBM spun off the operation. The new company is called Unicomp, and their keyboards are still made in Kentucky. Available from here: https://www.pckeyboard.com

    As far as laptops go the best keyboards consistently come from Lenovo’s Thinkpad line, another ex-IBM product line. These also have the benefit of being more affordable than the Macbook Pro and are available in more form factors, including one that’s pretty much identical to the Macbook Pro (X1 & P1). If you do purchase a Thinkpad, I recommend looking for online coupon codes before placing your order as they are generally available when buying Lenovo.

    If you have more questions you can get my real e-mail address from Anatoly Karlin.

    • Replies: @Jim Christian
  40. Rep Omar has been dissing old Joe lately. Says he’s not the candidate for change “we” are looking for.

    Did she just get Biden elected president? 🙂

  41. @Simon Tugmutton

    And how strong are they on golf-course design?

    Much less baseball stats.

  42. Goatweed says:

    Follow up.

    “Only white lifeguard”.

    Plausible?

  43. @Reg Cæsar

    Is that supposed to be Dean Martin on the left?

    • Replies: @Clyde
  44. TWS says:
    @Anonymous

    I write in a different voice than I speak in. Tried dictating and my work just didn’t read the same.

  45. “I am returning to my home planet.”

    Before you go please delete me from your simulation.

  46. Olorin says:

    I am returning to my home planet. My work here is complete because you earthlings can now carry on.

    Don’t you ding-dong-doodely dare.

    Not unless you’re packing the rest of us into the tail of your comet. It’s our planet too.

    😀

  47. Clyde says:
    @ScarletNumber

    Is that supposed to be Dean Martin on the left?

    Internet says you are correct! Very observant! He was the smoothest fakest cowboy. ____ https://tinyurl.com/yxr98zgn

  48. Clyde says:
    @Steve Sailer

    I’m procrastinating waiting for Apple to go back to the good keyboards of the past.

    Their ultra-thin laptops make keyboard design difficult. There have been many complaints. From what I read they will take care of this problem in their upcoming laptops. They are revamping keyboards.

  49. Bubba says:
    @Reg Cæsar

    After listening to this song in college many years ago I travelled throughout the south in the late 80’s and early 90’s for work and never encountered a ” Tastee-Freez” in any small, tiny, podunk town (or anywhere else in the south for that matter). DQ was in most small towns, but “Tastee-Freez” was like a “Bigfoot” or “Sasquatch” siting. Folks heard of it, but never saw it. So I thought John Cougar Mellencamp got it mixed up with Dairy Queen.

    And then I thought that line by John Cougar Mellencamp about the “Tastee-Freez” ranked up there with Bruce Springsteen’s line in “Glory Days” when he sang, “he’d throw that speedball by you, make you look like a fool”.

    What the hell is a “speedball” in baseball? Was Bruce getting his street terms for cocaine/herion mixed up with a “fastball”?

  50. @Paleo Liberal

    Did she just get Biden elected president? 🙂

    Wouldn’t you love that? Getting the second most corrupt politician in the history of the United States of America elected to the highest office in the land? It did not work with Hillary, but your hope springs eternal, right PL?

  51. Alden says:
    @J.Ross

    There was a cereal called Sugar Corn Pops popular when Biden’s sons were kids.

    Why do you watch NPR?

    • Replies: @J.Ross
  52. @Olorin

    Not unless you’re packing the rest of us into the tail of your comet. It’s our planet too.

    You know the libtards will follow us wherever we go. If we find a new home in the galaxy, or universe, and go there, we will make it function. The libtards we leave behind won’t be able to make Earth function. Therefore, those parasites will find us, and demand that we make their lives soft, cushy, and consequent-free of their stupid decisions. But we will not cast them adrift.

    Or will we?

  53. @Bubba

    What the hell is a “speedball” in baseball?

    What oldtimers keep score with:

    • LOL: Bubba
  54. MBlanc46 says:
    @Anonymous

    The keyboard on my c. 2009 iMac is the best I’ve ever used.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
  55. Anonymous[427] • Disclaimer says:
    @Bubba

    I saw small town Tastee Freezes, often closed down and boarded up but with the sign intact, driving around northeast small town Missouri a few times, the one in Chicago, and another somewhere else that escapes me now. They existed.

    There are around 22 left according to their web site:

    https://www.tastee-freez.com/locations-all/

    None in Missouri and none in the City of Chicago. the one we used to go to there was next to a funeral home on the 10200 block of Ewing Ave, and is long defunct. There are three in Illinois all told. (One is combined with a Der Wienerschnitzel, itself an almost extinct chain.)

    • Replies: @Bubba
  56. Anonymous[427] • Disclaimer says:
    @MBlanc46

    iMacs have separate keyboards, so there’s no telling which you have. Did it come with the iMac in the box or was it added on by the store or a previous user?

    Apple keyboards since the original toaster Mac have varied from decent to tolerable to yecchy. Some of the clear plastic era ones had a good feel and the ones with the pastel colored CRT all in ones were tolerable. The ADB era ones were not especially bad.(None the less a lot of Mac power users bought NeXT keyboards for use with their Macs, and there were also many decent third party aftermarket ADB keyboards.) The thin ones out for the last several years are unusable to me, your mileage may vary. Of course on any modern Mac they are USB so you can use any USB PC keyboard.

    No modern Mac laptop has a keyboard as good as that on any business class Dell or Lenovo, but the real problem with using a Macbook for me (and I do have one) is the touchpad, not the keyboard. I have to carry a Microsoft style two button USB mouse with me to use the computer at all.

    The best keyboard Apple ever used was the one in the II+. The IIe had many advantages but the keyboard didn’t quite have that same feel. I’m sure the II+ used a unit sourced from a company who made them for dumb terminals whereas by the IIe Apple had enough money and volume to make their own to a cheaper spec. (Most new ASCII terminals cost more than an Apple in the late seventies. You could buy an 8 bit micro and use it as a terminal cheaper than actually buying a new terminal for probably up until the IBM PC came out.)

    The prize for Best. Keyboard. Ever. probably is a tossup between the Symbolics Ivory era one and those used on some of the photosetting mchines and newspaper-oriented text terminals in that same time period. But the common IBM AT and XT keyboards were very, very good, which is why they still make one just like them today in the original plant that made them. One reason the PC steamrollered the purpose designed home computers such as Atari and Commodore made was that the latter had crappy keyboards, whereas the IBM had a very fine one.

    • Replies: @Jim Christian
  57. J.Ross says:
    @Alden

    >why do you watch National Public Radio?
    https://postimg.cc/R3Tfwrg4

  58. @Anonymous

    One reason the PC steamrollered the purpose designed home computers such as Atari and Commodore made was that the latter had crappy keyboards, whereas the IBM had a very fine one.

    The other is that no one wanted to be associated with Apple keyboard man-splainers.

  59. @Thorfinnsson

    If you want a truly good keyboard you’re best off purchasing a discrete mechanical keyboard,

    No offense, Thor but $90-$170.oo so I can read my CPU functions on a lighted but otherwise basic IBM keyboard? Forgetting the lights, their keyboard can be had via a corded IBM mechanical keyboard from WalMart starting at $12.00. They aren’t AT-connected and so aren’t authentic, but I’ve found that USB works too!

    • Replies: @Thorfinnsson
    , @Clyde
  60. Brutusale says:
    @Bubba

    The Springsteen lyric only confirmed to me that Brucie undoubtedly throws a baseball like a 7-year old girl.

    Speedball…

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Speedball_(drug)#targetText=Speedball%20(or%20powerball)%20is%20a,parts%20due%20to%20drug%20synergy.

    • Replies: @Bubba
  61. @Jim Christian

    I’m not poor, and there are plenty of mechanical keyboards which don’t have LED lighting (mine doesn’t). “Basic” IBM keyboards have 104 separate buckling spring switches and are expensive to manufacture, which is why they were phased out of the mainstream computing market. Modern mechanical keyboards have German or Japanese manufactured switches. Features like LED backlighting cater to the gamer market, and personal I don’t care for LED backlighting.

    That said, more affordable mechanical keyboards which use Chinese clones of the Cherry switches (German mechanical switches in most mechanical keyboards) are available starting at $30. If you do your homework you can get a good one.

    I’ve never seen an IBM Model M (let alone Model F, which is what I assume you mean by AT-connected) at Walmart or any other retailer. 10-15 years ago prior to mechanical keyboards (re)gaining popularity you could often find deadstock for next to nothing, but those days are gone.

    http://www.nycellc.com/vintage-ibm-c-78/1391401-ibm-model-m-clicky-keyboard-refurbished-p-882.html

    A dozen years ago they’d send this to you for free as long as you paid shipping.

    • Replies: @Steve Sailer
    , @Jim Don Bob
  62. @Thorfinnsson

    I’d have an IBM XT in 1984 and an IBM AT in 1986. They had great keyboards, although they may have weighed five pounds.

    • Replies: @Thorfinnsson
  63. @Steve Sailer

    I’d suggest getting a USB keyboard, from Apple, like the one I own, but not only has Apple decided to eliminate the DIN-8 headphone jack that works with every headphone ever, it has decided to eliminate the USB port that powers generations of peripherals.

    This isn’t planned obsolescence but a forced march into new peripherals for reasons I cannot fathom. Add new ports if you must, but keep at least one USB and HDMI, please. I will be buying reconditioned laptops until they give me, built in, the ports I’ve used for more than 10 years.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
  64. Clyde says:
    @Jim Christian

    I use a Dell 8115 keyboard that dates from 2004. I use this on my one desktop. It gets great rankings at Amazon>>>> https://www.amazon.com/Dell-Genuine-104-key-Keyboard-SK-8115/dp/B0037H8AB4 (I have laptops too)

    This keyboard is thick and bulky. For the designers and manufacturers in China, getting things right with this old Dell keyboard was 100x easier than getting today’s laptop keyboards right, due to lack of space for the keys to be touched and released. Apple aspires in an OCD way to ultra thin, so even more difficult to design an ultra thin keyboard for their laptops. And Apple has been screwing up on this (faultless keyboards) for about five years as their laptops got thinner and thinner. Apple has been fending off unhappy customers for five years on this “issue”/ “issue” because most keyboard complainers are hi-revved professional women and if women didn’t have their “issues” they would have nuthin’.

  65. @Steve Sailer

    My Das Keyboard 4 Professional weighs three pounds.

    New IBM-style keyboards from Unicomp weigh seven pounds. These are based on the later IBM Model M keyboard, which strictly speaking isn’t as good as the Model F you used. But it’s very close.

    Over time the PC industry realized that personal computer prices couldn’t support keyboards of the same quality than mainframes did, so now keyboards are mostly unsatisfying disposable commodities.

    But they’re dirt cheap and can even be thrown in a dishwasher for cleaning, which will permanently ruin an old IBM keyboard. As will spilling beer on it, as I discovered much to my dismay.

    • Replies: @Anonymous
  66. Dissident says:
    @sayless

    How could The Times hire a writer who thinks that “placate” means “soothe” ?

    Placate? Isn’t that what Bruce Jenner’s been doing for some time now?

    [MORE]

    (play Cait(lyn))

    • LOL: sayless
  67. @Bubba

    You understand that Springsteen isn’t an athlete by any stretch of the imagination, right?

    • Replies: @Bubba
  68. @Charon

    Dean Martin always was a ladies’ man.

  69. Anonymous[427] • Disclaimer says:
    @TomSchmidt

    Apple makes it a point of pride to not give people what they want, but rather what it thinks they really need. They’ve gotten away with this for decades because Steve Jobs, style fascist par excellence, had also a personal compass of what worked and didn’t that was fairly accurate. However, Apple engineers starting with Burrell Smith (actually not a trained engineer at all, but a test technician who designed the original 128k Mac motherboard and conspired to sneak in expndability) had a tradition of going around Steve’s whackier impulses and hiding a way around those that failed.

    But Jobs is dead and there is no one commanding on the bridge. Cook, for all his virtues, is a numbers guy, not an idea guy. Sooner or later Apple will run aground.

    • Agree: Bubba
    • Replies: @TomSchmidt
  70. Anonymous[427] • Disclaimer says:
    @Thorfinnsson

    If you write-fiction, nonfiction, code, whatever-for a living or a serious hobby, nte up for a first class keyboard. Unicomp is probably the best today.

  71. @Anonymous

    I think the $1100 iPhone may be a bridge too far. I’m stuck at generation 6 phones because of the need for the phone jack (“need” being want). The SE does a great job of supplying the phone power I need while also fitting in my shirt pocket. Not much after it meets that standard.

    It’s a very valuable company, but the short sale when it comes will reap much.

    • Replies: @Jack D
    , @Jack D
  72. Bubba says:
    @ScarletNumber

    Really!?! I thought he was a farmer.

    https://humanevents.com/2012/03/12/bruce-springsteen-a-taxdodging-farmer/

    BTW – one doesn’t need to be an athlete to know that a “speedball” doesn’t exist in baseball vernacular.

  73. Bubba says:
    @Brutusale

    The Springsteen lyric only confirmed to me that Brucie undoubtedly throws a baseball like a 7-year old girl.

    Good point! I never thought of it and think you may be right. Can’t find a single mention on Google (granted on on my cell with a so-so internet connection during lunch now) that he’s ever thrown out the 1st pitch of any baseball game. You’d think every MLB team would love to have him do it.

  74. Bubba says:
    @Anonymous

    Thank you very much for the information!

    Reading up on Tastee Freez (and Der Wienerschnitzel, which dropped
    “Der” in 1977), I realize that John Cougar Mellencamp was probably hanging out with his investment banker near the Tastee Freez headquarters in Newport Beach, California when he wrote the song “Jack & Diane.”

    My work colleagues and I will make a concerted effort during our next trip to Illinois to visit a Tastee Freez.

    Thanks again!

  75. Jack D says:
    @TomSchmidt

    In previous generations, Apple made sure you would want a new phone by throttling back the old ones as soon as the next generation was released. But they have been caught with their hand in the cookie jar and can’t use that trick any more. Most of the review say that the latest iPhone is nice to have but not a revolutionary improvement over existing models. And the rest of the market has caught up with the iphone – you can make an argument that the iphone is still leading the race but the competition is right at their rear bumper and not trailing far off in the distance. It used to be that unless you were running an iPhone or another flagship, anything else would be noticeably inferior sometimes to the point of being almost unusable. But nowadays, the average person could run a lower bracket phone (or a previous generation iPhone) and it would be perfectly adequate for their needs.

    But selling Apple short is still a risky bet – they have a very loyal fan base and some people just HAVE to have the latest iphone no matter what.

  76. Jack D says:
    @TomSchmidt

    In previous generations, Apple made sure you would want a new phone by throttling back the old ones as soon as the next generation was released. But they have been caught with their hand in the cookie jar and can’t use that trick any more. Most of the review say that the latest iPhone is nice to have but not a revolutionary improvement over existing models. And the rest of the market has caught up with the iphone – you can make an argument that the iphone is still leading the race but the competition is right at their rear bumper and not trailing far off in the distance. It used to be that unless you were running an iPhone or another flagship, anything else would be noticeably inferior sometimes to the point of being almost unusable. But nowadays, the average person could run a lower bracket phone (or a previous generation iPhone) and it would be perfectly adequate for their needs.

    But selling Apple short is still a risky bet – they have a very loyal fan base and some people just HAVE to have the latest iphone no matter what.

  77. @Thorfinnsson

    I have three of the Model M keyboards, and am typing this on one. Ebay says they go for $200+.

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