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Why the ¡Ask a Mexican! Column Has Come to an Adios
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Dear Readers: Many of ustedes must be scratching your heads right now. “What happened to ¡Ask a Mexican!” you’re preguntando yourselves. “Who the hell is this cholo nerd where the Mexican logo used to be?”

It is I, gentle cabrones: your eternal Mexican. Gustavo Arellano, child of immigrants from Zacatecas, one whom came to el Norte in 1969 in the trunk of a Chevy driven by a hippie chick from Huntington Beach. And I’m triste to say that this columna is coming to an end. Ustedes probably don’t know this, but my day job during the life of ¡Ask a Mexican! was at OC Weekly, an alternative newspaper in Orange County, California, where I was born and raised (don’t believe The Real Housewives of Orange County: there’s a chingo of raza here). I started as a staff writer, then became managing editor, then was editor for nearly six years until October 13, when I resigned instead of laying off half my staff, just like the Weekly’s owner wanted me to. No me rajé, and I’ll never regret quitting my dream job because I know I did the right thing.

But with me leaving the Weekly, I also must leave behind ¡Ask a Mexican! See, I don’t own the trademark to the title, and I’m can’t pay muchos pesos for something that the Weekly’s owner (or the ones before him) should’ve given to me as a gift for 13 years of being the hardest-working Mexican this side of Beto Durán.

I thought about continuing under a different name (¡Ask a Pocho! ¡Query a Mexican! ¡Pregunta, Pendejo! But then I realized I don’t have to continue the column anymore. See, I’ve been to el cerro. And I’ve seen the Promised Land of Aztlán.

It sure doesn’t seem like that at a time when millions of our friends and familia are at risk of deportation, when Donald Trump wants to build a border wall (man, where’s Alex Lora when you need him?) and when gabachos keep mistaking Día de los Muertos for Halloween. But we’re now at a place where whip-smart humor is at the touch of a meme. Where our political and economic power continues to soar like voladores totonacos. We live in an era where everyone can be a defender of la raza against gabachos, whether said gabas assault us or try to claim Rick Bayless is great.

In other words, ¡Ask a Mexican! is no longer necessary, because Mexicans have won a war that began when Sir Francis Drake sunk the Spanish Armada. We’re here , y no nos vamos. We’re victims no longer; we’re actually chingonxs. And the sooner Mexicans realize this, the better we’ll be.

ORDER IT NOW

I’ll let others debate whether my attempt to fight racism with satire and stats was visionary or just vendido. I’ll still answer questions about Mexicans on The Tom Leykis Show on the last Wednesday of every month at 4 p.m. (tune in to blowmeuptom.com), because doing so keeps my mind Julio Cesar Chavez sharp and not Julio Cesar Chavez, Jr. soft.

But in print, no más. Besides, let ¡Ask a Mexican! die, and let its passing join the pantheon of gabacho atrocities against Mexicans, like the U.S. stealing half of Mexico or Rick Bayless.

I wish modern-day journalism allowed me more print space, so my thanks must be brief. Gracias to: friends, Marge, family,my chica; All the papers that carried my columna over the years; Santo Niño de Atocha; Will Swaim; Daniel Hernandez. David Kuhn. So many more.

Nos vemos, gentle cabrones. Follow me on social media to see what I do next, and hook a compa up with bacanora! No se rajen against evil. Diga no a la piratería ¡Viva la Reconquista! Oh, and #fucktrump

Email Gustavoat [email protected], be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano or follow him on Instagram @gustavo_arellano

 
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  1. Dan Hayes says:

    Gustavo,

    I have to admit that your column has never been first in the heart of this countryman, but I profited from it. How? Well it provided me with an insight into the thinkings of my Mexican-American countrymen. Of course only after suffering through your slap-dash sophomoric humor.

    And maybe in retrospect it was only just a plot by Ron to broaden the minds of his card-carrying Paleoconservative readers.

    But anyway my sincere best wishes for your next endeavor – GOOD LUCK!

  2. “… let ¡Ask a Mexican! die, and let its passing join the pantheon of gabacho atrocities against Mexicans, like the U.S. stealing half of Mexico or Rick Bayless.”

    Gabachos may have stolen them, but just look what they did with them. Viva ¡Ask a Mexican, and good luck to you in your future endeavors.

    • Replies: @vera
  3. TheJester says:

    Good riddance to both you and California!

    You were the racist as a spokesman for the masses of illegal California immigrants who flash mobbed the US border. You refused to assimilate. You brought your Mexican identity with you and kept it, becoming yet another internal demographic hostile to the idea of the United States on the model of Afro-Americans.

    You did everything to make California another province of Mexico. You succeeded due to open borders and the raw numbers that made the crossing in a thinly veiled Mexican Reconquista. Now, 43% of the people in California do not speak English at home; 20% do not speak English well if at all.

    Adios to you … and viva Calexit!

    • Agree: RadicalCenter
    • Replies: @uslabor
    , @EagleEye
  4. Xerxes says:

    You will be missed, a lot.

    Cheers

    • Replies: @Dan deav
  5. … and let its passing join the pantheon of gabacho atrocities against Mexicans, like the U.S. stealing half of Mexico or Rick Bayless.

    And by some strange coincidence, we stole the half with all the paved roads.

    • LOL: Alden
  6. Anonymous • Disclaimer says:

    Gosh, Hector, are you Aryan enough to get your racist bilge published in Mexico City?

  7. You seem like a likeable goofball, but I opted out after reading one of your columns maybe 6 months back. If I’d known you were a La Razist, I’d have left plenty of comments here.

    Yeah, you have to go back. Adios ,¡amigo!

    • Replies: @uslabor
  8. @The Plutonium Kid

    And by some strange coincidence, we stole the half with all the paved roads.

    Heh! (psssst, I’m not sure Hector here would even get this … he understands just a little, no comprende, it’s a riddle.)

    “I hear hot wind on my shoulder,
    I dial it in from south of the border.
    I hear the talking of the DJ,
    can’t understand just what does he say.”

    More on Beans, Beaners, and Political Correctness from Peak Stupidity.

    • Replies: @JerseyJeffersonian
  9. You didn’t fight racism, you were the racist.

  10. I’ll still answer questions about Mexicans on The Tom Leykis Show on the last Wednesday of every month at 4 p.m. (tune in to blowmeuptom.com), …

    I didn’t realize that Tom Leykis was broadcasting a daily show. I’ll be sure to listen. I’ve followed Leykis off and on since the early 90s when he was doing radio in Phoenix.

    Gustavo, I used to read your column in the Phoenix New Times. Enjoy your new endeavors.

    • Replies: @jack ryan
    , @Triumph104
  11. He took a long time to say Unz pulled the plug.

  12. One down, 30 million to go.

  13. @Achmed E. Newman

    Achmed,

    I saw the phrase, “…he understands just a little, no comprende, it’s a riddle…” in your post and I immediately flashed on the source. Loved that song and that band. Let’s hear it for the 80s, a time when genius musical nerds like Stan and company could find a place in the sun. I was just thinking about this album the other day, but since my wife & I just recently moved, my original vinyl and turntable are not available. Your post made me go to YouTube to seek out the whole Call of the West album there. Don’t know which cuts are my favorites, there are too many from which to choose.

    Thanks. Now back to work cataloging newly-arrived microfiche of Congressional hearings for our collection here at the Law Library at Rutgers/Camden, but inspirited by this music.

  14. vera says:
    @The Alarmist

    The bloody gall, telling the US it stole a chunk of Mexico, when Mexico stole 100% of its land from the Indios.

    • Replies: @The Alarmist
  15. @Bill Jones

    Haha! Nice one! (And at least you’ve got the number right too…. 11 million is a crock).

  16. @JerseyJeffersonian

    Hey, JJ, thanks for this. I will listen to the whole thing when I can. I had always just thought of these guys as a one-hit-wonder band, and the video sure helped as that was in the days when MTV didn’t suck (that sure is dating myself). Bands back then spent time on these things, and I always remember the guy’s face coming out of the pot of baked beans.

    How ’bout the drummer – this song doesn’t do him much justice, I’m sure (at least in video form), as all I saw is him hitting some type of percussion thingy about once every 3 seconds – nice work if you can get it!

    If I can slip in one more embed, we can keep the political incorrectness going with The Vapors:

    Some P.I.C. would be a good send-off for this fool Mexican that has been taking up valuable space from people who talk about how much they love Chairman Mao and shit (seriously??!!). Without iSteve and the other VDare guys*, I’d have to just spent time writing argumentative comments till blue in the face.

    * Oh, and my man Ron Paul, of course.

  17. Ivy Mike says:

    I love you Mexican! Even though you look Irish…#doublefucktrump!

  18. @vera

    Well, to be fair, it was Spain that stole the land from the indios, and then the creoles and mestizos banded together to take it away from Spain. Yeah, I know, the mestizos got the short end of the stick, but hey, that’s life. Funny how the creoles of Mexico have weaponised them for the reconquists, eh?

    • Replies: @in the middle
  19. @JerseyJeffersonian

    I would have chosen Mexican Radio, but I guess that would have been cliche.

    They Don’t Want Me would also have been a good choice in this context, but I’m too lazy to find the official video.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  20. mario says:

    come down to el salvador some time…its politics all the time…and nice people…santiago de maria and suchitoto are the places to go…

  21. @The Alarmist

    … that would have been cliche.

    How so?

    • Replies: @The Alarmist
  22. George D says:

    Good riddance.
    I stopped reading his self-righteous trash long ago.
    He’s a jerk, but thinks highly of himself.
    His rants were vulgar (meaning both crude and ordinary)
    and his intellect nonexistent.
    I could never understand why he was allowed on this website.
    Good riddance.

  23. I have to admit that I stopped reading your Q&A about a year ago. I just couldn’t deal with your racism and anti-white bullshit. Furthermore, with most of the questions you didn’t really even answer them, unless you consider a snarky sneering kind of thing with a few mexican slang words thrown in for extra confusion an answer.

    You’re a pretty weird cholo. Just because there is a chingo of la raza in your county doesn’t mean much of anything unless they assimilate out of Mexican culture and into American culture and then? What’s the point of you?

    By the way, I’m sure you know this but not sure you’ve ever mentioned it (though you should have mentioned it in every single column you wrote): Mexicans hate the fuck out of chicanos. They think they are phoney pinche pochos and that’s obvious from Mexican film and culture.

    I am truly sick of entitled chicanos acting like they have the keys to the kingdom that us humble gabachos will never ever acheive. It’s the same nitwitery that you see with blacks. Both races at last in the US appear to have confused attraction to certain cultural artifacts, music, styles, slang, with envy and submission, or something.

    Hey I like what Mexican culture has brought to American culture, I like what black culture has, too. But I’m not beholden to la raza or black people. I wouldn’t want to be ever either.

    We freely assimilate what we like about all cultures. That’s America and always has been. Except with blacks and chicanos that apparently ain’t ok. There is a hard core Mata Todos Los Gringos vibe that underlies every thing about chicano culture. And it’s racist.

    And it’s prideful. And it’s stupid.

    I have a collection of chicano mural art from my degrees in Hispanic & Spanish Literature and Chicano Studies. Most of it comes from Cheech Marin’s multi-million dollar collection. Frankly? Most of it is insipid. Mexican mural art is far far far far superior.

    Let’s put it this way. Good riddance. Maybe you can take a little time to be less orgulloso with your bad ass self. Vete.

    • Replies: @Alden
  24. “…I don’t own the trademark to the title, and I’m can’t pay muchos pesos for something that the Weekly’s owner (or the ones before him) should’ve given to me as a gift…”.

    Tough luck, isn’t it Gus? The same deal Charles Schulz had with Peanuts’ syndicator, yet somehow he managed to eke out a living and never publicly complained about it.

    Nobody likes a crybully Gus. Get over yourself.

  25. Joe Sweet says:

    Don’t let the puerta hit you on the culo on the way out. Douche.

    • Replies: @Rosamond Vincy
  26. fish says:

    Well that was less than gracious on all sides!

    Didn’t read you much but vaya con dios nevertheless!

  27. Anonymous • Disclaimer says:

    Excellent news. I’ll think of you whenever I gaze upon The Wall and be glad.

    I hope to read Fred Reed’s goodbyes next. :)

    California isn’t going anywhere, BTW. Everyone who doesn’t belong there, and we all know who they are, shall be leaving instead.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  28. I will miss you, mi amigo. I’ve read your column to liven up my Spanish. Sometimes my patients are amazed at what I can say en Espanol.

  29. Anonymous • Disclaimer says:

    Your columns were the best illustration on why letting a large number of Mexicans into this country is such a bad idea. Not fully assimilating in 45 years is pretty bad – even you would probably agree.

  30. TheBoom says:

    Mexicans have achieved a pyrrhic victory. We live in an era, to be more accurate, where the once paradise of California has been reduced to being Mexico norte complete with a small white rule class and plenty of poor but submissive dark people who don’t speak English but do have a poor education. As with Mexico the ones who aren’t wealthy want to flee and given the opportunity do so.

  31. @Achmed E. Newman

    Sorry, I missed your earlier posting …

  32. I admire your initiative in creating and building your column over many years, and agree the publisher should have given you the trademark. I was an enthusiastic regular reader for some months. After awhile, the excessive snark and sarcasm wore me down, and I eventually stopped reading your column. I hope you find a suitable outlet for your talents, perhaps with a new approach.

    • Agree: Triumph104
  33. biz says:

    Yeah, the US “stole” half of Mexico just like Mexico stole it from Spain 20 years earlier and Spain stole it from some pueblo tribes before that, and those pueblo tribes stole it from some other pueblo tribes.

    But it is interesting: How did the US know to annex exactly the half that would become Silicon Valley, Hollywood, Los Alamos Lab, the Johnson Space Center, and so on?

  34. Jeff77450 says:

    I’m always pleased to see a source of Leftist propaganda, misinformation and deception come to an end. I encourage you to spend your retirement immersing yourself in the works of Thomas Sowell, Victor Davis Hanson and the like and “taking the red pill.”

  35. @Anonymous

    As for Fred Reed, along with guys like Mario (#20 comment here), the Banana Republics can be a good life living off the American dollar. When the US dollar goes down the toilet, WHICH IT WILL, y’all don’t come back complaining to me about it the fact that YOU are now the guy doing people’s laundry for $2/week, your groceries for one week use up your entire SS check, the senoritas aren’t very nice and friendly any more and the senors even less so.

    As for California, I wish that were true too, Anonymous, but I think it’s too far gone. It is Paradise Lost, as per TheBoom (comment #33), and per Peak Stupidity. I hope I am wrong.

  36. El Chapo and Sean Penn

  37. @Joe Sweet

    “Douche” is French.
    I believe the word you want is “pendejo.”

    • Replies: @Joe Sweet
  38. Dumbo says:

    Finally! Don’t let the puerta hit you on the way out, cabrón.

    Seriously, this was one of the most criminal uses of dead trees ever.

    Hint: using a Spanish palabra every sentence is not satire and is not funny.

  39. MarkinLA says:

    What restaurant will you be busing tables at so we can come by and say hello?

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  40. When California becomes like Mexico what are you going to do? Become an illegal immigrant in Canada? Do you like cold weather?

    The Republican Party is pro immigration, not the AM radio-Trump Repuplicans, but the Wall Street Journal-Bush family Republicans. High immigration means cheap labor. Do you think the guys at The Wall Street Journal are pro immigration because of the kindness of their hearts? Republicans got their cheap labor, but will be voted out of office. Democrats got the immigrant vote, but Mexicans will vote for other Mexicans, (Diane Fienstien is being challenged by a Mexican.)

    After la reconquista we will have bull fighting in California. That’s something we should have now.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  41. @MarkinLA

    That wasn’t any more gracious than my posts, but,

    hahahahaaa!

  42. @We shall be immigrants in Canada.

    The two parties have those reasons you state, WSBIIC, which is why they work in cahoots very well on this issue. It is some serious bipartisanship action, both stupid and evil. However, there is a bit more to this on the top end. The globalist elites that really run things in the this country, the heads of the big corps, the Soros’ and almost all of the 0.01% – ers – those types just feel in their hearts that they’d be better off without the middle class, especially the white, middle class we have had for a century or so.

    It irks the elites that there are people who could compete with them for the best places to live, have entrepreneurial ideas that could complete with their global businesses, deal in their own real money perhaps, and form associations built to fix the system (which they don’t want fixed.) They would like to live in the 3rd world, as the rich, of course, not the peons. They need to import people that are “cool with” (the other end of) the 3rd world. That’s the real back story behind this.

    Mr. Gustavo Arellano Rodrigues Sanchez Ramirez Gonzales here, of ex-Ask-A-Beaner is just an effect of the work the elites have been doing for 5 decades running. He’s probably not a bad guy, but 30,000,000 of him is no good. Just due to the numbers, these guys are no longer your father’s illegal aliens during the day of the Frito Bandito.

    My comments here may seem pretty harsh, but I’m glad to have a chance to air my views – thanks, Ron Unz. However, please please don’t call me a Xenophobe.

  43. ¡A la reputisima madre que te parió El Muy Chingón! Ha sido un gran placer romperte las pelotas.

    For Mr. Unz, a suggestion for a replacement for Gus: Hector Carreon must be looking for a venue and some revenue. La Voz de Aztlan has been down for what– four, five years now? Why don’t you look him up?

    • Replies: @Joe Sweet
  44. Joe Sweet says:


    “Douche” is French.
    I believe the word you want is “pendejo.”

    Yeah. I’m aware of that. It’s unlikely, but perhaps somebody here learned something from your comment.

    Pendejo was the obvious choice, which is why I didn’t choose it. Had I chosen it, my entire comment would have been obvious and cliche, instead of just the first sentence.

    I made the choice I did in order to mock the putrid style of the execrable cretin who has just bid us a welcome farewell. It wasn’t the French word that I was actually calling him but the American word DOOSH, meaning, of course, “asshole”. See? I was mocking his moronic devotion to properly italicizing Spanish words while expressing his ugly and pathetic thoughts in my native language.

    Hope this helped.

  45. Joe Sweet says:
    @Jim Bob Lassiter

    Hmm. Pretty sure it’s unanimous that Kathy Shaidle will be filling Gus’s vacancy with her new column “Ask a Canadian”.

    I heard it over at iSteve.

    And that’s only fair, as she’ll be the voice of a truly at risk and silenced people.

    • Replies: @in the middle
  46. Joe Sweet says:
    @Rosamond Vincy

    “Douche” is French.
    I believe the word you want is “pendejo.”

    Yeah. I’m aware of that. It’s unlikely, but perhaps somebody here learned something from your comment.

    Pendejo was the obvious choice, which is why I didn’t choose it. Had I chosen it, my entire comment would have been obvious and cliche, instead of just the first sentence.

    I made the choice I did in order to mock the putrid style of the execrable cretin who has just bid us a welcome farewell. It wasn’t the French word that I was actually calling him but the American word DOOSH, meaning, of course, “asshole”. See? I was mocking his moronic devotion to properly italicizing Spanish words while expressing his ugly and pathetic thoughts in my native language.

    Comprenez vous?

  47. mts1 says:

    The most shocking thing of this goodbye is his photo. With all of his talk about oppression I expected a very Indio descent Danny Trejo looking guy, not Gary Burghoff. He should be at the top of the stack in the Mexican caste system. How’d he end up slumming here? No wonder he was always so angry. Somehow he lost his Criollo privilege.

    • Replies: @Excal
    , @segundo
  48. Excal says:
    @mts1

    No, he’d be second, maybe even third tier. Top-caste Mexicans are not readily distinguishable from native northern Spaniards, except that they don’t tend to speak Castilian. (It is astonishing how long this has persisted.)

    Come to think of it, this may be why he may have a prominent chip on his shoulder for La Raza (assuming he’s serious), which is decidedly all about half-castes. One must have hobbies, I suppose.

    Senor Arellano at least turned his hobby to the amusement of others, and however ridiculous his opinions about stolen land blah blah, and however often his column failed to quite scale the loftiest heights of comedy, I will miss it, and except where he may be aiding the continued invasion of California, I wish him good luck.

  49. ! Vaya con Diablo !

    • Replies: @Pepe
  50. @The Alarmist

    Nah, I am sure the rest of Mexico don’t give a crap about California, or anything else. Its the politicized people in the States who care about it. Plus, you are right, millions don’t speak English in California because they speak 87 other languages! I believe Spanish is but one of 86 others; ignorance is not a bliss!

  51. @Joe Sweet

    We should have a ” ask a Euro American!” hahahah, since we are in the ‘come from’ chat.

  52. @in the middle

    It’s weird that you say something about ignorance when I can go a whole week and never hear any of those other 86 and only hear 1……Spanish. Even the billboards are in Spanish.

    It is to the point now where one can NOT GET a job in retail without the ability to speak Spanish.

    AND I hear IRL, not just on the internet, this “stolen land” meme.

    One last thing, I witness an accident years ago where the driver and passengers were speaking pretty good English to those of us helping until police arrived and then not one person in the car could speak English. I alerted the police officer of this as I was questioned and he just rolled his eyes and mumbled “that’s how it works in these cases”.

    so, most immigration bills have a speak English requirement and I think that is a total waste of time as there is no reason what so ever to learn English in California.

    California is being balkanized.

    • Replies: @Alden
  53. Alden says:
    @restless94110

    Chicano comes from the Spanish word chicanery. Chicanery is also an English word. In both languages it means cheating. Chicano means a person who cheats, can’t be trusted etc. Why any group would adopt that word as their identity I don’t know. Unless maybe they didn’t know what it means in either language.

    • Replies: @uslabor
  54. Alden says:
    @interesting

    California is being balkanized the better to control us my dear, said the Big Bad Wolf.

    An even worse fate awaits us. Many of the better high and middle schools require the kids to take Mandarin. I guess the administrators know who our next overlords will be. The language in my California neighborhood is English and Persian depending on age of the speaker. 15 miles north of my neighborhood the languages are Armenian and English depending on age of the speaker.

    5 miles east the preferred languages are Russian and Hebrew.

    There are some good things about Mexicans or Latins. They tend to be reasonably honest small business people.

    Best response to the “southwest belongs to Mexico” c**p is to ask, How many years did Mexico rule Texas? A. 14 years. How many years did Mexico rule California? A. 26 years. They mostly don’t know the exact number of years. So you can add that America’s ruled those states for 181, 169, whatever years.

    But the best thing is to try to not have anything to do with them. Saks, Nordstrum, Boomingdale’s and the more expensive stores still want English speakers. Gas tax was just raised 12 cents a gallon.

    • Replies: @RadicalCenter
  55. Alden says:

    I’ve read a few of his columns. They appear in the weekly throw away newspaper in my city. You know, the kind that lives on escort girl and boy service ads. It’s my opinion that he made up most of the questions, just to show how dumb and ignorant non Mexicans are.

    • Replies: @MarkinLA
  56. MarkinLA says:
    @Alden

    Yes, I once sent an email to him asking him why all the stray dogs seem to disappear from the streets of Ensenada just before the taco stands open and he never put that question in his column.

  57. Oh no. Where will I find a Mexican to ask.

  58. Pepe says:

    I’m just now noticing the foto above.

    Perfect. Goose at a food truck, presumably in SoCal, selling burritos. That says it all.

  59. bwa ha ha ha haaaaaaa
    as numerous others opined, stopped reading his racist drivel some time back, TRIED to make sense of it and get *something* out of it, but it was THE SAME bullshit repeated tirelessly and tiresomely…
    .
    i think you missed an obvious alternative column title, based on your picture:
    ask the twinkie…

  60. @in the middle

    Spanish is not merely one of 80-plus languages spoken in California, but the clear number two and gaining on number one every year.

    Spanish will become an official coequal language of government and later, education, in California even if it stays in the USA nominally. Not happy about it, but we live in Cali and it is coming.

  61. @Alden

    Our children will all be learning mandarin fluently from an early age, in an immersion program. One has started, several more to follow. Reality is what it is.

  62. J1234 says:

    Finally!

    (The most comments on UNZ he’s ever received, and it’s because he’s leaving. )

    Adios.

  63. segundo says:

    Congrats! You have to go back. Don’t let the puerto hit you in the culo!

  64. segundo says:
    @mts1

    My th0ughts as well. Muy blanco!

  65. Anon • Disclaimer says:
    @Priss Factor

    D–n it, Priss, you beat me to it!

    But I think the introduction to the following version might help bid goodbye to a column neither slow nor fast, but …

  66. uslabor says:
    @TheJester

    ” You refused to assimilate. You brought your Mexican identity with you and kept it,”

    You don’t read very well, amigo. The Eternal Mexican didn’t bring anything with him: HE WAS BORN HERE, en Los Estados Unidos.

    We Chicanos are as American as you are. We’ve been here for over 400 years. Maybe YOU didn’t assimilate, muchach-o!

    • Replies: @Anon
    , @anon
    , @Anonymous
  67. uslabor says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    “Yeah, you have to go back. Adios ,¡amigo”

    Another gringo who can’t read English. He was born in the USA, gentle cabrone, dumbass.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
    , @WJ
  68. uslabor says:
    @The Plutonium Kid

    “And by some strange coincidence, we stole the half with all the paved roads.”

    And the side with the failing nuclear power plants. Enjoy!

  69. @uslabor

    Both of you are emitting entirely too much carbon dioxide and should vamoose together, prontomundo. To Mr. “Ask-a-Mexican”, we didn’t mind some of the old-timey Mexicans back in the day, but I knew the Frito Bandito, I worked with the Frito Bandito and you, Sir, are no Frito Bandito! Take your sidekick, Mr. uslabor, who is no Dorito Bandito, with you.

    • Replies: @uslabor
    , @uslabor
  70. uslabor says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    Va-moose a way-yer, Ohm-bray? Ain’t going nowheres, born right he-yer. Four generations worth of kin folk growd here in Coloradey. It hurts my feelin’s that ye think I ain’t no Frity Bandidty. Bite me, you Bozo. We won. Why don’t you go back to were ever you and your mama’s from.

  71. uslabor says:
    @Achmed E. Newman

    I forgot, what does “prontomundo” mean?

  72. uslabor says:
    @Alden

    Blow it out cherass. Cherass is an English word, cabrone.

  73. Anon • Disclaimer says:
    @uslabor

    We’ve been here for over 400 years

    Maybe you have. Gus sure hasn’t. Wish him luck though.

  74. George says:

    “Mexicans have won a war that began when Sir Francis Drake sunk the Spanish Armada.”

    A history of success and failure in language education:
    Cortez teaches the Aztecs to speak Spanish 1521
    Spanish Armada fails to teach the English Spanish 1588
    English Armada fails to teach the Spanish English 1589

    My point is if the English Armada was somehow successful (it was as poorly conceived as the Spanish)
    Spain would have had a major calamity in the Iberian peninsula to deal with. Spain would not have been able to reinforce her colonial possessions, so a possible Aztec reconquest of their lands, perhaps in alliance with England, might have been possible.

    But then again Mexico and the Aztec Empire are unrelated and even opposed to each other, so maybe Mexicans have won a war that began when Sir Francis Drake sunk the Spanish Armada.

  75. Sad Sack says:
    @Bill Jones

    Even that 30 million number does not jive…that was the number of illegal aliens being talked about during the 2008 Presidential Race…by all sides….then….shortly after the Great Divider was elected…that number dropped to 11 million…for the entire dreary 8 years of its’ incursion….and all the while it was massively importing locos gatos from south of the border by the millions…and quietly importing Mohammedans from points East across the pond.

    So, HOW MANY illegals are now resident in the US of A??? North of 50 million?….and a good number of them voted in the 2012 and 2016 Presidential Election….oh, yes. At Barry Soetoro’s Public insistence.

    Where are the calls for justice on these many injustices.

    Interestingly…the “children” being brought into the USA from points south of the border over the last three years of Barry’s reign…were largely very much adult men…this is the very same dodge used in western Europe…with the importation of Adult Male Mohammedan’s. The very same liberal Progressive Global Communists’ in control of the Bureaucracy and the Media Propaganda Horn…on both continents. Yes, pobrecito’s…save DACA. Imbeciles.

  76. Who doesn’t read well? The Infernal Mexcan didn’t say he was born here, he said he got here in the trunk of a Chevy. Mexicans are now pouring out of Mexifornia for the same reason they left Mexico. To find a place in Dixie or the mid-west without so many Mexicans fucking everything up. Real Mexican Americans know this.

  77. anon • Disclaimer says:
    @uslabor

    HE WAS BORN HERE.

    Only because his parents invited themselves here.

  78. I read the column occasionally, thinking I might find something of value, but it seemed to lack gravitas and had too much underlying racism.

    We need Martin Luther Kings, not faux intellectual gang-bangers.

  79. Karl says:

    > “i quit rather than fire half the staff to keep the other half employed as long as possible”

    now you know why earthquake relief had be to flown in from Ramat David Israel Air Force Base, halfway around the globe, instead of from within your own ethny.

  80. segundo says:

    Being “born here” doesn’t make you American. A Paper American, maybe. You still have to go back, Tabo!

  81. By quitting, you let The Man f’ck you. I bet you let him pay you only minimum wage, too.

    ¡Pobrecito!

  82. jack ryan says: • Website
    @Triumph104

    Is tom Leykis still on the air somewhere?

    he’s brilliant, funny, but sadly… a bit sexist.

    • Replies: @Triumph104
  83. Flemur says:

    I thought we got that half of Mexico because Canada didn’t want it.

  84. I have no problem with Mexico or Mexicans. I wish you well. I have however an abiding hatred for the Americans who threw open our southern border. May they rot in hell.

    • Replies: @interesting
  85. @WorkingClass

    And right there is the rub. Our masters do not give a shit about your working class ass. No matter how much YOU make you are over paid……even if you worked for FREE the ruling class would ask……How can you work for less.

    We all thought slavery ended……it didn’t end, it evolved to where the salves have to feed and house themselves.

  86. Rename it to “Ask a Pocho” and keep writing the same stuff and it’ll will be more accurate at least

  87. el topo says:

    So long. Your snarky racism will not be missed.

  88. @Triumph104

    I tried to end things on a positive not, but this thread keeps going. Gustavo, I heard you on the Tom Leykis show just after you posted this column and you sound like a first-class nut. I understand that as a child of someone who entered the country illegally you have to justify the behavior, but you have zero understanding of basic economics, supply and demand. Increasing the number job seekers stagnates and lowers pay.

    Tom Leykis is having trouble keeping podcast subscribers. He loses as many as he gains. (LINK) He is joking but don’t be surprised if he can’t make payroll. (LINK) For some reason Leykis keeps retweeting negative left-wing posts about Papa John’s Pizza mistreating its workers (LINK) (LINK) , but sarcastically tells low-wage workers to move to Las Vegas if they can’t afford Los Angeles rents and one of the women in the article is undocumented with a family.(LINK) If you are going to pander and pretend you are liberal at least be consistent.

    If anyone is thinking about subscribing to Tom Leykis’s podcast, be aware that once subscribed you have to go through an employee to make any changes or unsubscribe. This reeks of desperation and potential problems.

  89. Atle says:

    Wait. There was some sort of column about Mexicans? And why would that be?

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  90. Hoolee says:

    You are not a Mexican, you were born and raised in California. It’s like OJ Simpson having a column called ‘Ask an African’.

  91. @Atle

    Wait. There was some sort of column about Mexicans? And why would that be?

    Probably a clever Ron Unz move to help bolster support for The Wall.

  92. güero says:

    What constitutes a Mexican-American? One of those whose familias been ranching in Nuevo Mexico since the conquest? Or a refugee campesino who refuses (or is unable) to assimilate?

    So you wanna go Aztlan? They only speak Nahuatl there, so you’re SOL ‘chacho.

    No manches, güey. Just don’t overstay your visa,,,la migra Mexicana,,,no le gustan.

  93. trutherator says: • Website

    Bumper sticker on a pro-Trump Mexican-American’s pickup truck in 2016:
    “I came to America to escape the Mexican nightmare, not bring it!”

  94. Michelle says:

    Pobrecito, Rick Bayless. El es uno gabacho whom celebrates Mexican culture actual. Leave it to minorities to completely misunderstand who are their friends and who are their enemies. Go ahead on though. Just annihilate all your allies.

    • Replies: @segundo
  95. segundo says:
    @Michelle

    That was my thought on Bayless as well, Michelle. The Goose just loathes gringos. Period.

    He has to go back.

  96. Gerardo says:

    I, as a Mexican, was always embarrassed by this low-class bufoon.

    • Replies: @interesting
  97. @Gerardo

    What I find most interesting is he’s as white as I am. I guess just speaking Spanish is a currency that now gets one into the “socially protected groups” to use a twitter terms of service terminology.

  98. Stew11 says:

    Get real you are not a Chicano but rather a Chinese American passing yourself off as a Chicano. Your photo exposes everything one or anybody needs to know about you Mr. Pork Fried Rice

  99. Figaro says:

    Thank God California got away from Mexico. Otherwise the state would be riddled with mass graves.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  100. Thirdtwin says:

    The real question is when this post is going to be taken down.

    Please, Mr. Unz. We are done here. Help Gus get on with his life, and cut the cord.

  101. Michelle says:
    @The Plutonium Kid

    Here in California, we paved over the great Spanish/Mexican highway that followed the Spanish Missions. El Camino Real, it is called. Pretty God damned amazing, I think.

    https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/El_Camino_Real_(California)

  102. “Help Gus get on with his life”

    Is that even possible? He’s spent a decade being the oppressed minority in a majority Hispanic state, what else does he have?

  103. WJ says:
    @uslabor

    If he was born here then he is not a Mexican. The title is misleading. I know nothing about because I once read five words of his tiresome twaddle and never looked at it again.

    • Replies: @segundo
  104. segundo says:
    @WJ

    There is no real constitutional basis for birthright citizenship. We’ll get that sorted sooner than later. The Goose has to go back. Hasta la bye-bye, pendejo!

  105. @Figaro

    Thank God California got away from Mexico.

    I hate to go all poltergeist on your ass, Frank, but …. they’re baa-aaaak !

    (maybe we shouldn’t have dug up those mass graves in El Segundo to make those culverts under the King’s Highway. Shoulda’ listened to Fred and Aunt Esther – they were always going on about El Segundo.)

    OK, that’s a wrap, Ron. This post is OVAH!

  106. Thirdtwin says:

    Mr. Unz, tear down this waaaah!

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  107. Anonymous • Disclaimer says:
    @uslabor

    HE WAS BORN HERE

    That makes his inability to assimilate all the worse and underlines the necessity to ship all the subversives like you back to the shitholes you came from.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  108. Dan deav says:
    @Xerxes

    As an AMERICAN of Mexican descent, La Raza and MEChA are two HATE Groups exactly like the KKK who preach Hate for America calling us Invaders on their land. Their goal is to take back AZTLAN, and make it Mexico again. In 1846 you bast ards invaded America and got your azzes kicked; by 1848, you lost, and this is America and always has been. It has always been Native American Land anyway.

    You Mexicans will NEVER take over AMERICA, and your idea of taking it back through “Population Growth” will be Stopped. You HATERS of the Greatest Nation on planet Earth is not Funny, it just shows how you Mexicans are so “Down Scale, Low Information Mexicans with NO Brains”.

    Don’t you Low Class, No Brains, Low Life Mexicans understand that we AMERICANS saved the WORLD in WWII, literally saved it from Hitler and the Nazi’s.

    It is about LOVE for the UNITED STATES OF AMERICA, and has Nothing to do with Ethnicity, Race, Religion, Color of your Skin, etc.

    Dan

    • Replies: @artichoke
  109. Get out. Make Mexico great.

  110. Looks like lots of people like this guy!!

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  111. @Father O'Hara

    It takes a lot to be kicked off of Unz – I mean there are flat out Commies on here, cough, Petras, cough, cough, Godfree, cough, cough. No, I don’t think Pedro here is very popular.

    Lastly, LAST

  112. Joe862 says:

    It’s hilarious how latinos seem to think they all have the sacred right to sneak into the US to be babysat by white people. We give them little jobs like mowing the lawn and flipping burgers. In return they hate us. And yet if you suggest they go back to one of their many many countries they get mad. If they find the thought of living with a bunch of Mexicans so hateful they can hardly blame us for feeling the same way. It’s too childish to discuss, I just cringe and turn away in disgust.

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  113. @Joe862

    I don’t think we and the Mexicans and Central Americans hate each other, until it come to politics. Most of them are not involved one bit, but their purported political leaders are not only ungrateful bastards but very hateful themselves.

    Most need to go back to reunite with their families and countrymen. It’ll be best for everyone except the Mexican elite, such as richest-man Carlos not-so-Slim, who got fat off the profits of telefono charges and that sort of middle-man stuff.

    For much more on the whole situation, Joe, there is no more comprehensive site on the subject than Vdare.com

    Anyway, LAST!

  114. artichoke says:

    So you’re declaring victory and going home shortly after Trump has been elected? OK we’ll declare victory too. We can both be happy, and one of us will be right.

  115. artichoke says:
    @Dan deav

    Mexico was neutral (at best) in WW2. An example in the large gap between our peoples, which we should recognize with good immigration enforcement and a good fence. Both ways of course, we don’t want all those Americans to sneak into Mexico either!

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  116. @artichoke

    I can’t argue with any of that, but …

    LAST!

  117. markflag says:

    Glad it is gone. Unfunny, unclever, and annoying.

  118. EagleEye says:
    @TheJester

    This is my first exposure to this guy …never read a column. but I suspect that the response here is correct. Just to give you a clue into my own personal experience with south of the border, which you might agree is formidable, I lived there for 32 years, have a business with employees since 1989 and my primary residence since 1987…..I speak and write fluent Spanish. last few years I got a major commission, from a Mexican, to do a mega job for him sourcing the material from Europe. So I was out of the country many months …..they will not give me a passport for that reason…! Tried every way possible with no luck……imagine my ire when Mexican families book hotels in Houston Dallas San Diego and go to local hospitals to have their baby’s so that automatically get a US passport…..try it in Mexico ! See how far you get.
    They bitch and wine but take the best of the US..,.and I promise you, etched in the psyche of every Mexican is the notion that what the US took land wise is still theirs and one day they will have it…..believe it, its true. And they will…..Do they have legitimate grievances ? No question, like every other Latin American country bribed cohearsed or forced to subjugation to US hegemony, but are they the “good guys ” ? I don’t think so …….Never believe or fully trust one ….you will regret it.

  119. Divergent says:

    Isn’t it just like a puerile Mexican to smugly declare victory in a war against a people who largely didn’t know they were supposed to be fighting. See, many Americans tolerated or even welcomed downtrodden Mexicans purely out of the goodness of their hearts — like that foolish hippie who snuck in this prick’s parent.

    There were others, of course, who were wise enough to rail against the presence of any Mexicans at all, but they were shouted down by a subversive media. Others, still, merely tolerated the presence of Mexicans peasant arrivals due to greed or some perceived personal benefit. Yet, the real reason that so many are now here is because powerful interests have been staging the conditions for societal breakdown and unrest.

    In any case, this treasonous hypocrite is openly calling for the invasion and ethnic cleansing of US territory and should be treated as an enemy of the State.

  120. Slamuel says:

    good riddance to this unreadable leftist tripe

  121. Ragno says:

    Many of ustedes must be scratching your heads right now. “What happened to ¡Ask a Mexican!” you’re preguntando yourselves.

    Not at all. Spineless American politicians rendered your column obsolete years ago, I’m sad to say.

    There is no point to a newspaper column called “Ask a Mexican” when anyone in America can stick his head out the window and do just that.

  122. Great comment, Ragno, and ditto for Mr. Divergent (comment #133).

    Fred Reed for Ask a Beaner columnist!*

    and LAST, dangit!

    * hat tip to someone on iSteve.

  123. I can’t read this column. NAFTA has destroyed Mexico. This was the intent of the “leaders” of what is now a failed narco-terrorist state in the first place. NAFTA was intended to displace millions of peasants and then send them to the United States to “reclaim” land which we “stole” from those innocent Mexicans. If Trump gets the wall and we stop the flow of legal and illegal Mexicans, Mexico will fall and NAFTA will fail. And this travesty against the Mexican people and against the United States people was also done with the blessing and the assent and the intent of the Clinton administration and the Republican Party. Build the wall!

    • Replies: @Achmed E. Newman
  124. @Roderick Mills

    I can’t read this column.

    Correct you are, sir. You cannot read this column, as it’s been defunct for just under 1 year. Mr. Ron Unz willing, we hope to replace this greaser with honorary-beaner Mr. Frederico Reedismimo. Until such time, there will be no more posts and comments. NUNCA, SENOR!

    • Replies: @Roderick Mills
  125. @Achmed E. Newman

    I would hope that the new columnist will discuss the destruction of both Mexico and the United States that NAFTA has wrought and by intention.

  126. I agree with you, Mr. Mills, that NAFTA was a bad thing for both countries. For America, however, it was the later one-sided (toward China) trade-deals made by cheaply-bought-off politicians, cough, Clintons, cough, cough, that were much more devastating.

    Mr. Fred Reed, were he to do this column, would probably not know enough to write coherently about the effects of NAFTA. He could tell you about what operatic shows you could attend and about the fabulous engineering schools down in Ole Mexico though. I was joking (took it from another commenter) about his writing here.

    ¡BUILD THE WALL!

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