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How Come You Call Yourself a Mexican?
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Dear Mexican: How come you call yourself a Mexican? By definition, you’re a Chicano, not a Mexican. A Mexican is a person that was born and raised in Mexico, not beautiful Orange County. A Mexican is a person that is proud of his country and appreciates and respects the Mexican flag even though he left the country years ago. A Mexican read the free textbooks provided by the Secretaria de Educación Pública during his school years and studied Mexican history. A Mexican is a person that sang the Mexican national anthem every Monday morning while watching six kids carry the flag around. Mexicans know the difference between the more than 150 chiles that exist in our country. Mexicans grew up eating candies with different chiles. Mexicans watch Televisa and Televisión Azteca, not Telemundo or Univisión. Mexicans speak fluent Spanish, not Spanglish. Mexicans came to this country to work hard and have a decent life, not to destroy this place like you and your people believe. Mexicans believe that family and religion are the most important values. Mexicans are not planning to take over California—we are too lazy to even think about it, and we do not believe in wars. I can go on and on describing the differences between you and me, but let’s just leave it like that. How can you even describe our culture, values or behavior if you don’t have a clue about it? Eating burritos at Taco Bell, going to Mexican parties in SanTana or having Grandma cooking some Mexican dishes doesn’t make you a Mexican.

Más Pendejo

Dear Wab: Let’s run down your list: check (most of my parents’ rancho had relocated to Anaheim by the time I was born), check, check (my dad’s cousin was a history teacher in Mexico), check, check, check, check (where do you think Univisión gets most of its programming? Lifetime?), por supuesto, check, and too late. Add to this my mestizo heritage, the facts that mi papi was an illegal immigrant and I didn’t speak fluent English until I was 6 or 7, and that I grew a mustache in the time it took you to read this sentence, and I’m more Mexican than Pedro Infante. Besides, who made you arbiter of mexicanidad, Real Mexican? National character is never static, and anyone who claims otherwise is as deluded as a Trumpbro.

 

Why do we always think Mexican men drink tequila and sing mariachi tunes, while the women are pretty señoritas?

Viva Mexico

ORDER IT NOW

Dear Gabacho: Mexicans frequently blame ustedes for perpetuating various stereotypes about nosotros over the centuries, but a big part of the blame also falls on us. During World War II, a time when Mexico’s film industry experienced a renaissance that scholars refer to as La Época de Oro (The Golden Age), Mexican movie studios produced great social tales, comedies and horror films, but the ones that received the most acclaim were the comedias rancheras. They starred matinee idols such as Pedro Infante and Jorge Negrete, who meted out frontier justice and wooed the chicas guapas from underneath sombreros—always while guzzling tequila and riding on horseback. The image came from the state of Jalisco, birthplace of mariachi and tequila. “Needing a people who could personify hispanismo,” wrote Joanne Hirschfield…[Mexican note: The answer continues, but thanks to shrinking newspaper sizes in the decade that I’ve wrote this, I can’t fit the whole respuesta in anymore. Support your local alt-weekly, gentle cabrones].

 

Ask the Mexican at themexican@askamexican.net, be his fan on Facebook, follow him on Twitter @gustavoarellano or follow him on Instagram @gustavo_arellano!

 
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  1. Más Pendejo:

    Mexicans came to this country to work hard and have a decent life, not to destroy this place like you and your people believe.

    Thank you so very much for that comment. I’m so glad to hear from Mexicans who respect and appreciate our country.

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  2. Estimado Más Pendejo:

    He aquí su boleto gratis al colectivo de los pobres despistados. Gus ni siquiera alcanza al nivel de un Californicador. Más bien es un alcahuete Gallego que representa más intereses creados (incluyendo sus propios) que la cantidad los piojos que residan en los pubicles de su madre inmaculada.

    Espero que mis observaciones gratuitas y no solicitadas sirvan pare orientarle mejor al asunto.

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  3. Dear Writeer of ‘Mas Pendejo’
    Your comments are correct.
    I married a Mexican woman who is now a permanent resident.
    I live with her within the “Mexican community”, i.e. social circles.
    I talk in Spanish with Mexicans.
    They all have some emotional loyalties to Mexico. That is normal, natural, good.
    They call themselves Mexican-Americans, not chicano’s; chicano’s is a term that describes “bad, gang-like, Mexican -Americans.

    Naturally the Mexicans everywhere are disturbed by Trump’s rash comments.
    He did not speak logically in a philosophical sense.
    He truly wants to end illegal immigration because many criminals as well as good people have slipped across the border.
    Trump’s general and specific language needs to be corrected in his appraisals of Mexican-Americans.
    Why does not the Mexican-Government grant visas to many more Mexicans?
    Because huge numbers of them, more than the number of those that come accross illegally, would then come across legally. Mexicao would lose 1/3 of its people, its tax base.
    In that case, all of them would simply, legally, apply for permanent residence and the United States of America could not deny them. Why?
    Because it is in our Constitution: the land of the free, “give me your immigrants, your poor, your downtrodden” — Statue of Liberty.
    I am in favor of allowing all members of “good, working families” to immigrate, whether or not they have a visa.
    Mexican-Americans form an important part of our American economy and its culture.
    The real social/psychological damage to Mexican-Americans in America is the prevention of Mexican families from being united, whether or not the “leader” came here legally or not.

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  4. Adar. says:

    “Mexican movie studios produced great social tales, comedies and horror films, but the ones that received the most acclaim were the comedias rancheras. They starred matinee idols such as Pedro Infante and Jorge Negrete, who meted out frontier justice and wooed the chicas guapas from underneath sombreros—always while guzzling tequila and riding on horseback.”

    Frontier justice until the Wild Bunch gringo showed up. Then the Mexican found out who was boss. I saw that in the movie.

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  5. Most of this abuse either reflects or parallels Paz’ essay “El Pachuco y otros extremos,” a semi-deranged excursion showing mainly that Paz had no idea what he was talking about. In fact the Pahcuco style was hugely popularized, both in Mexico and the United States, by a Mexican comedian, Tin-Tan (Germán Valdés).

    But what did the highly anglicized, Europeanized Paz, raised partly in Washington, D.C, know about that? Next to nothing or more. Nor did he care to.

    His pictures of Mexico, which he sees largely as an ousider, are equally fantastical, saved only by his admittedly considerable literary skill. But of ocurse this stuff all appeals greatly to gringo publishers and critics.

    His article on Duchamp is a mess–long pages beating around the bush in high style and never once getting to the crux of anything at all.

    As for has affair with Kundalini Yoga it becomes almost humorous on sustained reading, if one can manage that.

    One once mentioned Paz to a professor of literature (not English) and she laughed–”I’ve had dinner with Paz. Of course he had two chickies, one on each side, draping and fondling him for the whole course of the affair.”

    Zappa was much more profound–learn the Pachuco, learn the Pachuco hop, jeje.

    That leaves Paz’ poetry, which is a different story and which one is not going to discuss here.

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  6. “A Mexican is a person that is proud of his country and appreciates and respects the Mexican flag even though he left the country years ago”

    AND AN AMERICAN IS SOMEBODY WHO LEFT THAT OLD COUNTRY AND RESPECTS THE ONE HE IS IN NOW AND LEAVES HIS CHILDISH DELUSION ABOUT THE OLD COUNTRY BEHIND…….AND IS PROUD TO BE CALLED AN AMERICAN.

    don’t like that? Go “home” if that is where your heart is.

    i don’t fucking hyphenate my label……I’m American, from head head down to my feet….this IS my home.

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  7. “psychological damage to Mexican-Americans”

    is that right there…..you apparently don’t consider yourself 100% American…..FACT.

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  8. Mexicans watch Televisa and Televisión Azteca.

    that is the most ridiculous statement here. First of all, TE IDIOTIZA, I mean televisa is so dumb and putrefactive that way many people don’t bother watching it. I asked my Mexican friends when was the revolution celebration, and most did not know, or ‘dia de la bandera’, etc. One thing you have to give to Mexicans, they keep voting for the criminal cabal called “PRI”. So, don’t blame us for voting for Trump. If I had a choice for Mexican President, I would chose Duterte from the Philippines. He knows how to deal with the cartels; Hell, yeah. Or even better, trade Trump for Duterte, and see what happens.

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